Over the years, my neighbour has buried his deceased pets in his backyard, and to his surprise, a plant has sprung up.
It's a Cemer Tree.
Girls just wanna have sun.
I went to a restaurant and had a salad. Afterward, I got an intense pain in my stomach. I visited the doctor and he told me that I had grass-troentiritis.
What is fog's favorite drink? Mountain Dew
Why did the Clydesdale give the pony a glass of water?
Because he was a little horse!
There are lots of funny jokes about mushrooms that can give you stitches. However, you need to be patient enough because they need time to grow on you.
Want to hear a joke about weather?
Actually, never mind. I'll just save it for a rainy day.
What book of the bible do you read on a beach?
The book of psalms trees.
What kind of shorts do clouds wear? Thunderwear!
My glasses fogged up once I came out of the AC room last summer, but I was okay because I was opti-mistic.
How do two rival forests get along? They sign a peace tree-ty!
Why are dogwood trees amazing pets? They have a great bark and a wooden bite.
During the contribution’s session, the mushroom family never gave a lot. They were just two spore.
I'm debating whether I should cross the river on foot or use my rowboat...
It's row v. wade.
What tree is bought the most at the plant store?
The poplar tree
What did the carp say to his crush?
Don’t play koi with me!
What do you call a martial arts expert in a tree?
Bruce Leaf.
Why did the cloud stay at home? It was feeling under the weather.
What did the egg say to the boiling water?
I might have some trouble getting hard, I just got laid this morning!
How do two flowers greet each other?
Hey bud, how’s it growing?
What is black, purple, blue, yellow and white?
Sugilite, sardonyx and opal all fighting over a gumball.
RIP boiled water.
You will be mist.
Me: "Hello? 911? Emergency! The neighbors house is on fire!"
Dispatcher: "Did you discover the fire?"
Me: "No! Prometheus! but what does he have to do with this?"
What do you call a benzene ring where the iron atoms replacing all of the carbon atoms? A ferrous wheel.
. How can you easily identify a dogwood tree? By listening to the bark.
Where does the sun hide at night? Just keep looking for it, it'll dawn on you soon!
The reason why mushrooms are always welcome even in high-end parties is because everybody believes they are really fun-guys.
I was trying to look at a picture of the ocean but kept having to reload the page, it finally worked after 5 attempts.
That was refreshing to sea.
How do rainbows sleep? In forty pinks.
The plant was tired of being boring.
It has decided to turn over a new leaf.
What did the tree tell the drill? You bore me.
My fire tonight...
Was lit!
What did the flower say after it told a joke?
I was pollen your leg
Where do the mushroom family keep their umbrellas, coats and shoes? In their porch-ini!
Why were the herbs not fully grown yet? They didn't have enough thyme!
Q: Why does a hurricane wear a monocle?
A: It has only had one eye!
Whenever someone wishes me to say "Happy Winter," it always leaves me cold.
Why do freshwater fish cry so much?
They’re just a stream of emotions.
What is at the end of a rainbow?
The letter W.
My grand father always said "fight Fire with Fire".
He was a great man but a terrible Fireman
How does one raindrop ask another out? Water you doing tonight?
What type of baseball player gives out all the water?
The Pitcher.
Where do flowers recharge? At a power plant!
Did you hear about the B I V G R O Y rainbow?
The poor thing has a deviated spectrum.
The weatherman said it might get a bit drizzly outside.
You can expect a Lil’ Wayne.
Which tree is more annoying, pine or oak?
Pine. Because pine needles while oak leaves.
Why did the cow go to space?
to get ice cream.
Where do shellfish go to borrow money?
The prawn broker.
My mind works like lightning.
One brilliant flash and it's gone.
Knock Knock?
Who's there?
Hurricane
Hurricane who?
Hurry! Cane you jog away from the storm?