Knock Knock
Who's there?
Accordion
Accordion who?
Accordion to the forecast, it's going to rain tonight.
I went fishing in the ocean the other day and caught one fish
but I think it was just a fluke.
Rivers are so lazy they never get out of their beds.
What did the rock say after it rolled into a tree? Nothing because rocks can’t talk.
My friend couldn’t pay his water bill anymore.
I sent him a Get Well Soon card.
What is the best way to communicate with a fish?
Drop it a line!
Why are trees such great thieves? They really have sticky fingers.
What do you call an 'O' on fire?
Flamingo.
The winter is the worst time of year for a wedding. The grooms always seem to be getting cold feet.
Did you hear about the boat that crashed into the beach?
The captain fell asleep and the crew didn't realize until they were already in the no wake zone.
If there's a will, there's a wave.
What is bigger than a Christmas tree?
A Christmas four
How did the apple tree get the job? It had the right qua-leaf-ications!
Q: What is a tornado’s favorite game?
A: Twister
Tropic like it's hot.
Don't get tide-up in sorrows, you will only cry a river.
Australia announced that they have begun dumping sewage into the ocean
It’s now classified as an in-continent.
What do you give to a sick citrus tree to make it feel better? Lemon aid.
Why are cedars so hard to get along with? They suffer from bigo-tree and ex-tree-mism.
Why do trees always hate taking tests? Because they keep getting stumped by the questions.
I sang the rainbow song to a cop yesterday.
They arrested me for colorful language.
My friend has just won the tallest Christmas tree competition
I thought to myself, 'How can you top that?
What do you call an old snowman?
Water.
What did one snowman say to the other snowman?
Do you smell carrots?
Why did the boy keep his trumpet in the freezer?
Because he liked cool music.
I couldn't figure out why that ball in the sky kept getting bigger...
Then it hit me.
Last night the river was arrested. The river was accused of illegal streaming.
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
When the moisture from the sky stops falling
It really stops waning
What did the man say when his wife asked if he remember to get the coffee with icecream inside it?
“Sorry! Affogato!”
What did the flower say when he wanted a second chance?
I’ll grow on you.
Many people think that when warm droplets of water in the air are rapidly cooled it forms fog.
But it’s actually a common mist-conception.
My glasses fogged up once I came out of the AC room last summer, but I was okay because I was opti-mistic.
The storm was sad so we called it the sigh-clone.
Why didn't the mexican archer fire his bow?
Because he didn't habanero.
Many years ago, my grandfather used to cut the grass- but, he's been gone for a lawn time.
The river turned out to be a great party guy because he just went with the flow.
Why was the Blonde fired from the M&M factory?
She kept throwing away the W's.
What did the pigeon say after being struck by lightning?
Not coo.
What does a fish say when he makes a mistake?
It was just a fluke!
What do trees write on? Loose leaf paper.
What is another king’s favorite type of precipitation?
Reign!
When the rainbow decided to speak out at the meeting of all weathers, someone said 'Look hue's talking.'
There was a terrible fire at the shoe factory today...
Over a million soles were lost.
What did the motivational speaker say?
Don’t take life for granite.
How do cows intake water?
by Osmoosis.
The weather man said there won’t be any rain for 6 months, but I drought it.
What is the the chemical formulation for candy molecules? Carbon, Holmium, Cobalt, Lanthanum, Tellerium—or ChoCoLaTe.
What goes up when rain starts to come down?
Umbrellas.
What did the flower do when she was challenged?
Rose to the occasion.
What do rocks eat?
Pom-a-granites.