What clothes do rainbows wear? Thunderpants.
What did they use to set off the amazon warehouse fire?
Amazon kindle.
The main difference between the weather and a horse is that one rains down while the other is reined up.
Whats a bad flower pick-up line?
Lets put our tulips together?
Why is the ocean always on time?
She likes to stay current.
There are more planes in the ocean than there are submarines in the sky
This much is plane to sea
There is always a first time to everything. For instance, when you take a mushroom either for lunch or dinner, you will be amazed at how magical it is.
I have a good nature joke but after listening to it, everyone just leaves.
Why did the cloud stay at home? It was feeling under the weather.
I stopped my phones to the cloud, and I kept getting mist calls.
Why was the bucket so embarrassed at the beach?
Because of how pail it was.
When can your cup of coffee tell the weather?
When it's muggy.
What's the difference between a BMW and a Cactus?
Pricks are on the outside of Cactuses.
I got fired from my job as a train operator and my job as a lightning rod.
I guess I'm just a bad conductor.
Every time I passed a ring-shaped coral reef with a coral rim that encircles a lagoon, I had to pay a fee. It was atoll.
What is a blue whale’s favourite James Bond Film?
Licence to Krill.
What’s a good winter tip?
Never catch snowflakes on your tongue until all the birds have flown south for the winter.
What do you call a can of soda in a conglomerate? Coca-Cola Clastic.
What kind of magazine does a rock like to read?
Rolling Stone.
Rivers are...
the original streaming service.
What did the bottled water tell the spy?
The names bond, Hydrogen bond.
Where does a snowman keep his money?
In a snow bank.
How do geologists like to relax?
In rocking chairs, of course!
Did you hear about the lazy flower who finally got his act together?
He just needed a kick in the bud.
I'll open fire on anyone who says video games make children violent!
Why don’t trees travel in groups? Because two’s a company, but tree’s a crowd.
Q: What is a wind turbine’s favorite musical group?
A: Air Supply
All the grasses were bumping into each other because the grass-light wasn't working in the streets.
I was gonna make a river joke, but I don't think it's current.
Why didn't the mexican archer fire his bow?
Because he didn't habanero.
What do you call a giant mushroom? Hu-fungus.
How do you get into the mush-room? Ring the porta-bella.
What do you call a friendly volcano? Lava-ble.
What did the ocean say when asked if he wanted to be friends with the beach?
“Shore!”
What does the birch like to study in school? Chemistree.
They told me they were handing out free beef at the beach...
When I arrived I realized it was a bay-con.
Why did the fisherman suddenly redirect his boat?
Just for the halibut.
What do you call the people that you eat grass and produce milk alongside?
Cow-workers!
What is the favorite Mexican food of snowman?
Brrrr – itos.
Where do fish keep their money? In river banks.
What is the most favourite drink of a cow? Mountain Moo.
What is black, purple, blue, yellow and white?
Sugilite, sardonyx and opal all fighting over a gumball.
HIJKLMNO is the formula for water
H to O.
Q: Why is there so much wind inside a sports arena?
A: Because of all the fans.
I hope it doesn’t rain Halloween night.
That would dampen spirits.
My fire tonight...
Was lit!
The shrubs were gearing up for a fight with the grass, but they never saw the blades come in.
What do you call a storm that's raining cats and dogs?
A furricane
I heard there are some fires near Greece
We’re gonna need a lot of baking soda.
What do you call a snowman party?
A snowball.