What did the rock say to the word processor?
Boulder.
The cloud hailed from the sky kingdom.
Why is the world so diverse? Because it contains alkynes of people.
RIP boiled water.
You will be mist.
What’s every ice cream parlor owner’s side hustle?
Sundae school teacher.
When can your cup of coffee tell the weather?
When it's muggy.
Why did the man driving a train get struck by lightning?
He was a good conductor.
What’s a cetacean’s favorite TV show?
Whale of Fortune.
I don't know if I just got hit by freezing rain, but it hurt like hail.
Please excuse my resting beach face.
There are so many puppies and kitties around the neighbourhood. Perhaps it is because it has been raining cats and dogs for hours.
What do you call two bandits in a race on the ocean.
Piracy.
Mushrooms always hate going to school. They feel inferior before the rest because they are always so spore-d.
What do you call a benzene ring where the iron atoms replacing all of the carbon atoms?
A ferrous wheel.
Salty but sweet.
What do snowmen eat for lunch?
Icebergers!
If your boat turns upside down in the river, you can wear it on your head because it's capsized.
Did you hear the joke about the elephant who was stuck in a tree last spring? To get down, she had to sit down on a branch and wait until fall.
My wife first agreed to a date after I gave her a bottle of tonic water.
I Schwepped her off her feet.
Where do birch trees keep their jewelry? In the river bank.
My Dermatologist was fired today...
He made too many rash decisions.
When is Monday coming?
MonSoon!
What flowering plant is an amazing equestrian? The horse chestnut.
Why is it impossible to have a balanced conversation with a female mushroom? - Because shiitake too much!
Why did the fisherman start doing drugs?
Pier pressure.
You want to hear the best rock puns?
Give me a moment and I’ll dig something up.
What does the birch like to study in school? Chemistree.
You can bet on firemen at the beach.
It's a shore-fire thing.
Got a cow helping me cut the grass. He's a lawn mooer.
What did the rainbow say to the pot of gold? You'll be the end of me.
The scientists decided to clean up the Thames because it had a dirty mouth.
Have a gneiss day! This is one of the simplest rock puns, but it is certainly a gneiss way to start your day out right!
What types of books do pines read? Poetree books.
What is a tornado's favorite movie? Gone With the Wind!
Why are mountains not just funny? Because they are hilarious.
Life's a beach. Enjoy the waves.
I was going to tell a joke about the natural disaster in the Indian Ocean
But it was too Tsunami.
I was fired from an insect repellent company for being dyslexic, so I smashed all their computers.
There’s no files on me.
They consider a million years ago to be Recent.
H20 is water, but what is H204?
It’s for swimming and drinking, of course.
Q: What did Julius Caesar’s pet windmill say?
A: I came, I spun, I conquered.
If your imagination hits peak high and you combine a toadstool and a suitcase, you won’t have mushroom for your vacation clothes.
I just got my degree in Sky Diving.
I had to drop out to graduate.
What do you call a chicken that was struck by lightning?
Air fried.
It's been a while since I heard jokes about people sitting on wet morning grass.
They're over dew.
Did you hear the was a fire at a used furniture store and two people died next door?
It was due the second hand smoke
When the rainbow decided to speak out at the meeting of all weathers, someone said 'Look hue's talking.'
The queen’s favorite form of precipitation is the reign.
Did you hear about the mother who gave birth to her baby while she was in the sky?
I guess you can say the baby was airborne
What do you call a grandpa flower?
Poppy.