The lake did not like the river because it felt that the river was not very lake-able.
Where do saplings go to learn?
Elementree school
Why is the ocean so salty?
Because the land never waves back.
RIP boiled water.
You will be mist.
Q: Where can a tornado be jailed?
A: In a high pressure cell.
Q; What’s the difference between origami and grandpa passing wind?
A: One is the art of the fold, the other, the fart of the old.
Where does seaweed look for a job?
In the kelp-wanted section
Why Did the Whale Cross the Ocean?
To get to the other tide.
What do you get from sitting on the snow too long?
Polaroids!
Q: Why do windmills love loud, heavy rock music?
A: They’re metal fans.
When something evolves, it becomes a fork of nature.
What do you call a storm that's raining cats and dogs?
A furricane
What is the favorite Mexican food of snowman?
Brrrr – itos.
There was news of a snowstorm. It arrived white on time.
Q: What do you call it when it rains chickens and ducks?
A: Fowl weather.
Why are mountains not just funny? Because they are hilarious.
What did the beaver say after she slipped in water?
Dam it.
Why did two fishes go to the riverbank? They wanted to withdraw their fins.
What type of diet did the snowman go on?
The Meltdown Diet.
Last night the river was arrested. The river was accused of illegal streaming.
Why was the food critic fired?
They didn't reference their sauces
What does a spy do in the rain?
He goes undercover.
Many people seem to believe that warm water droplets get cooled fast and form fog. It's a mist-conception. Someone should de-mist-ify it.
I have a good nature joke but after listening to it, everyone just leaves.
What is the most favourite drink of a cow? Mountain Moo.
Whale, hello there.
Why shouldn't you smoke weed during a thunder storm?
Because lightning strikes the highest object.
What did the fish say when it ran into the wall?
Dam.
Why are you bringing me to this mountain river after our couple therapy session?!
Our therapist said I need to valley date you.
Does all this rain make you want an ark?
I Noah guy.
When is it raining money? Whenever there's 'change' in the weather.
In what state is the Amazon River? It is in the liquid state.
How did the old man walk his way out of the storm so fast?
Because, he had a hurry cane.
Why do some trees hate playing checkers? Because they are true chess-nuts.
When is Monday coming?
MonSoon!
My Ex-wife called me to tell me my son was arrested for setting a house on fire. I corrected her saying...
Arson.
What did the flower write in his mother’s day card?
I’m proud to be orchid.
What do you call a tree with no tinsel, baubles, or topping?
A tree.
Son: “Hey Dad, can we go to the beach?”
Dad: “Shore?”
Do you know what would happen when you throw a Finnish sailor into the ocean?
Helsinki.
I got fired from my job as a train operator and my job as a lightning rod.
I guess I'm just a bad conductor.
Have a gneiss day! This is one of the simplest rock puns, but it is certainly a gneiss way to start your day out right!
What did the teaching tree do when it went overseas? It took a leaf of absence!
The police officer went to the crime scene and he saw that there had been a murder in the dense grasslands. Guess, we could call it a grass-assination.
This very fair weather actually makes me feel like a feather!
A pilot friend of mine took the flight exam and flew past a rainbow. No wonder, he passed with flying colors.
Why are coyotes howling in the night?
Because they can only see the cactuses in the day.
Two rocks at the bottom of a mountain. First rock: Avalanche!
Second rock: Ha! I'm not gonna fall for that again!
What weighs more: a pound of logs or a pound of leaves? They weigh the same.
I had the best ice pun to tell you…
Problem is, it slipped my mind.