What did the metamorphic rock say during the test?
This is too much pressure!
What kind of magazine does a rock like to read?
Rolling Stone.
What happens if someone chucks a rock at you? You hit the rock’s bottom.
What element comes from Norse mythology? Thorium.
How do blondes define hydrophobic on their school tests? A fear of utility bills.
Where do rocks like to sleep? In bedrocks!
Did you hear about the metamorphosis professor who just gave up on life? He really needed a change.
I really hate rock puns.
My sediments exactly.
Why did the fold get arrested?
Because it was caught rolling a joint.
What did the gold say to the pyrite? You’re a fool and a fake!
What did the rock say to the word processor?
Boulder.
If I could change the periodic table, I would put Uranium and Iodine next to each other.
Did you want to hear the joke about the mountain? Never mind, you would never get over it.
Why is the world so diverse? Because it contains alkynes of people.
What do you call a rock that never goes to school?
A skipping stone!
Where do rocks like to sleep?
In bedrocks!
What do you call a can of soda in a conglomerate? Coca-Cola Clastic.
What happens when you keep reading geology jokes in your free time? You know that you have really hit rock bottom.
What do you call a rock that never goes to school? A skipping stone!
Why was the sedimentary rock so cheap?
It was always on shale.
Why did the tectonic plates break up?
It wasn’t her fault, but there was just too much friction between them.
Why did the tectonic plates break up? It wasn’t her fault, but there was just too much friction between them.
What do you call a benzene ring where the iron atoms replacing all of the carbon atoms? A ferrous wheel.
What did the metamorphic rock say during the test? This is too much pressure!
Why can’t minerals ever lie? They’re always in their pure form.
What do you call a periodic table when the gold is missing?
Au revoir.
How do geologists like to relax?
In rocking chairs, of course!
What type of fruit includes Barium and double Sodium? BaNaNa.
What did the bartender say when he saw oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium and phosphorous enter his barroom? OH SnaP!
What did the chemist cowboy tell his horse? HIO Ag!
This rock was magma before it was cool.
Get it?
What is black, purple, blue, yellow and white? Sugilite, sardonyx and opal all fighting over a gumball.
Have a gneiss day! This is one of the simplest rock puns, but it is certainly a gneiss way to start your day out right!
Bill’s house was rocking last night, everyone got stoned.
Too bad Bill didn’t have avalanche insurance.
Why did the toddler chew on pebbles? He wanted to eat rock candy.
What do you call a periodic table when the gold is missing? Au revoir.
What did the boy volcano say to the girl volcano?
I really lava you!
What do rocks eat?
Pom-a-granites.