Rock was magma before it was cool.
What is black, purple, blue, yellow and white?
Sugilite, sardonyx and opal all fighting over a gumball.
What did the gold say to the pyrite? You’re a fool and a fake!
How do geologists like to relax?
In rocking chairs, of course!
I really hate rock puns.
My sediments exactly.
Why is the world so diverse?
Because it contains alkynes of people.
What did the boy volcano say to the girl volcano? I really lava you!
What type of weapon can you make with potassium, iron and nickel? A KniFe.
What did the bartender say when he saw oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium and phosphorous enter his barroom? OH SnaP!
What did the gold say to the pyrite?
You’re a fool and a fake!
This rock was magma before it was cool.
Get it?
What happens when you blend sulfur, tungsten and silver together? SWAG.
What did the diamond say to its friend copper? Nothing, silly, minerals don’t talc!
Why was the sedimentary rock so cheap?
It was always on shale.
Where do rocks like to sleep?
In bedrocks!
Did you want to hear the joke about the mountain? Never mind, you would never get over it.
You want to hear the best rock puns?
Give me a moment and I’ll dig something up.
What do you call a periodic table when the gold is missing?
Au revoir.
Why can’t minerals ever lie? They’re always in their pure form.
What do you call a rock that never goes to school?
A skipping stone!
What element comes from Norse mythology? Thorium.
What did the metamorphic rock say during the test? This is too much pressure!
Why did the tectonic plates break up? It wasn’t her fault, but there was just too much friction between them.
What do you call a benzene ring where the iron atoms replacing all of the carbon atoms?
A ferrous wheel.
Why did the toddler chew on pebbles? He wanted to eat rock candy.
They consider a million years ago to be Recent.
Why did the tectonic plates break up?
It wasn’t her fault, but there was just too much friction between them.
What do you call a benzene ring where the iron atoms replacing all of the carbon atoms? A ferrous wheel.
What kind of magazine does a rock like to read?
Rolling Stone.
When were rock puns the funniest?
During the stone age.
What happens if someone chucks a rock at you? You hit the rock’s bottom.
Why was the sedimentary rock extra cheap?
Because it was on shale.
Why is the world so diverse? Because it contains alkynes of people.
What did the boy volcano say to the girl volcano?
I really lava you!
What did the teenage rock say after failing its drive test? I don’t want to talc about it.
What did the metamorphic rock say during the test?
This is too much pressure!
What happens when you keep reading geology jokes in your free time? You know that you have really hit rock bottom.
What did the chemist cowboy tell his horse? HIO Ag!