Hey baby, you know what sounds good? You and me never speaking to each other again.
What did the weather reporter say to his wife?
“I hope it doesn’t rain, deer!”
Did we fall from the sky? Because we look pretty broken up right now.
Sorry sweety, but I think I'm in love with your mom.
Do those legs go all the way? Because you should use them to go away.
It’s a good thing we’re bad at puzzles because there is no way we’re putting this shit back together.
"Roses are red, Violets are blue. Garbage is dumped, now so are you."
"Remember when I asked you out? Well, I was talking to the girl behind you"
Are you a dollar bill? Because you’re single.
"Roses are red, violets are blue. We're breaking up beacause I never loved you."
If you take the "L" out of LOVER. Its OVER.
Hey babe, I think its about time we cancel our gym membership. We're not working out anymore
I think we need to become better strangers.
There's something I've been wanting to say since the day we met. Goodbye.
"You deserve better and so do I."
We must be a cast on a spiral fracture, girl. Because we’re on a serious break.
Girl: Want to see a magic trick?
Boyfriend: Sure.
Girl: Poof you're single.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'd rather be dead than continue seeing you!
We're donion rings.
Are you a stop watch? Because our time is up.
How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the thin ice our relationship is on.
I'm not gay but I'll learn.
Wanna see a magic trick? Abrakadabra, you're single now.
"My cat doesn't like you."
Girl, have we both been rendered sightless? Because we ain’t seeing each other anymore.
Raise your hand if you have a boyfriend.
Not so fast
Hey baby, are you in a tunnel? Because we’re breaking up.
Our relationship is like my financial status: Broke.
Are you the dog? Because your shit’s all over the lawn.
What’s your sign? Mine is stop.
I think it would be hot if we f**ked other people. Exclusively.
Will you be the sun in my life? Then stay millions of miles away from me.
I think this has been said somewhere else.
Hey Pumpkin, I just wanted to say that I'm done with having Halloween every day.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Girl its been fun
But im leaving you
Damn girl, are you a magician’s assistant? Because I want you to disappear from my life.
It's not you...it's your taste in music.
What’s the difference between me and your socks? I’m not yours anymore.
"Is it hot in here or is this relationship suffocating me?"
Hey, did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because honestly, Karen, you are a demon.
We should make like your parents and split.
Girl you're looking like a snack and I'm going on a diet.
Hey, baby. I'm calling myself Han because you need to be Solo.
"I'll always remember last night, but I think we can forget about tomorrow."
You look like my future ex wife.
Hey girl, you must be a math book because you’re full of problems.
They say one man's trash is another man's treasure. I hope you find someone who treasures you.
"We are like a broken mirror. It is better to leave it broken than hurt yourself to fix it."
Roses are red
And you gotta go
Because I found out
That you is a ho.
Knock knock. Who's there? You're - You're who? - You're single!
"You're not Mr. Right.... just Mr. Right Now."
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