At the end of the year, there is always a rock n’ bowl concert where everyone gets entertained.
How many Winter Park ski instructors does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to screw it in, and two to say, "Nice Turns, Nice Turns!"
I prefer the new system to reviewing line calls. When Hawk-eye came around, I breathed a big Cy-clops of relief.
Setters do it better. This sounds like a good motto to put on a T-shirt.
Why can’t a car play football?
Because it only has one boot.
What did the football coach say to the broken vending machine?
Give me my quarter back.
Two tomatoes went jogging. One trips and falls. The other tomato said, "Grab my Heinz and I'll help you up." Trippy tomato replies, "Nah, you go ahead. I'll ketchup."
What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on Juan.
Why can't tomatoes ever beat lettuce in a race?
Because lettuce is always a head, and tomatoes have to ketchup!
Ideally, the cost of a bowling game should be ten pinnies. However, with inflation, the price always goes up.
What did the mathematician do at the baseball game?
Square root for the home team.
During holidays, soccer referees send their families yellow cards.
What kind of insect is bad at football?
A fumble-bee.
Where can you find a golfer on a Saturday night?
Clubbing.
Where do ski instructors keep their money?
In the local snow bank.
Wife: I’m sick and tired of your obsession with golf!
Husband: Why, is it driving a wedge between us?
Why did the quarterback suddenly walk off the field?
The coach told him to take a hike!
[Chicken] We’re serving this during the game, so you might call it a live ball fowl.
The bowling solder decided to launch a pre-emptive strike.
Grasshoppers do not fancy soccer matches because most of them prefer cricket matches.
What type of films should players watch to improve their shot? Slap stick.
We pass expectations, set the standards and kill the competition. This is definitely one of the best volleyball puns to use as your team’s motto.
What should you do when you play volleyball against a team of satanists? You beat the hell out of them.
The football won’t be the only thing spiked at this party.
The favorite soccer position for ghosts is the ghoul keeper.
What type of stroke does a classical musician use when swimming?
The Bach stroke!
Did you hear that Notre Dame gave up four interceptions last week?
Knute Rockne would turnover in his grave!
The basic rule in the bowling game is to ensure you leave no pin standing.
How can you tell a vampire likes baseball? Every night he turns into a bat.
Bowlers do not make good employees. This is because for 80% of the time, they are always going on strike.
It feels great to hit the ball again. It spin a long time.
Did you hear about the rundown swimming pool?
It was a real dive!
What do you get if you cross a tree and a baseball player? Babe Root.
Ski Area Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, know what I have in common with this new powder? 8 inches.
The refs kept calling interference, even though goalmouth incidents were in
de-crease.
What do you call a woman standing in the middle of a tennis court?
Anette.
Where does a fisherman go to get his hair cut?
The fisherman goes to a bobber shop!
I quit my job as a scuba diving instructor after my first day at work.
Deep down I realized it wasn’t for me.
Why can you never use a serve receive pattern against a sniper? They’d all start running for cover.
Spending time at the pool really floats my boat.
What's the difference between a high-hit baseball and a maggot's father?
One is a pop fly and the other is a fly pop.
The dog didn’t want to play soccer because it was a boxer.
Set or be set. This is certainly the right way to look at things.
What do you call a Spanish football player with no legs?
Gracias.
Skier in ER: Doc, I slipped on my way to the chairlift.
Doctor: Icy.
Good bowlers always keep their minds out of the gutter.
Why was the mummy added to the game as a pinch hitter?
Because the manager knew he could wrap it up.
Tennis is a lot like waiting tables. The most important thing to get right is the first serve.
The success in this sport is not how you bowl, but how you roll.
Do you know the easiest way to stop squirrels from playing soccer in your garden is to hide the ball? Well, it drives them nuts.