Why was the nice guy such a lousy baseball player?
Because he never got to home base.
What do you call a free treadmill?
The Great Outdoors.
If there's a Tim Horton's chain, should there be a Lanny McDonald's? Or Doug
Harvey's? And what about Ron's Francise?
How did the octopuses win the football match?
Ten tackles
What do a rabid rabbit and a basketball player have in common?
Mad hops.
What do runners do when they forget something?
They jog their memory!
Why can't you tell a joke while ice fishing? Because it'll crack you up!.
Why was the football pitch a triangle?
Because someone took a corner
What did the baseball glove say to the ball?
Catch ya later.
Why should you never go back in time to alter the outcome of a football game?
You’ll be called for past interference!
Which commandment do baseball players hate the most? Thou shall not steal.
Why did the volleyball players like to practice in the library? Their coach said that they’d be doing some reading today.
Did you hear about the football team that drafted a vending machine?
They really needed a quarter back!
If somebody says "You pitch great for a southpaw," is that a left-handed compliment?
Why was the wheelchair basketball team banned from the Paralympics?
They all tested positive for WD-40.
What do frogs do when they ski?
They rip it.
Deep sea diving is so dangerous.
I just can’t fathom it.
What did they give former Flyers left-winger Brian when he successfully
bulked up? Massive Propps.
How do you call football without shoes?
Socker.
I like big punts and I cannot lie
Why should you you stand on the service line? So that you can order ice cream.
What do you call it when a football player suffers a career-ending injury in his last game before retirement? Gridirony!
The football won’t be the only thing spiked at this party.
Why did the volleyball player cross the street? There were players on the other side.
What does a basketball player say when he misses?
Shoot!
If you happen to knock down all the pins, don’t be overly excited. Spare us the details.
Brother: "I saw a seahorse scuba diving"
Dad: "Wow that's amazing, I didn't realise they had the technology."
Did you hear about the Owl that could play American football?
It was a superb_owl.
Would they get two minutes for tripping?
Not if they spliff the defence.
When the pitch is flooded, soccer players can still go on. They just need to bring on their subs.
When is the course too wet to play golf?
When your golf cart capsizes.
Where does a fisherman go to get his hair cut?
The fisherman goes to a bobber shop!
I almost brought a screwdriver to the football game, but was stopped by security
They said that match-fixing isn't allowed.
They say that you can spike a volleyball. But you can never take away its dig-nity.
How are snow boards and vacuum cleaners alike?
Both have dirt bags on board.
Why did the volleyball player get sent to jail? Because he was set up.
When is an MLB ballpark the hottest?
After all the fans have left.
Did you hear the joke about the pop fly? Oh, nevermind. It was over your head...
Have you ever played quiet tennis?
It's just like regular tennis but without the racket.
The perfect name for a pig that plays basketball is a ball hog.
What is a volleyball player’s favorite drink? Sets on the Beach.
The reason why soccer players are brilliant in math is because they know how to use their heads well.
What are the favorite video games for basketball players? Shooting stars.
There is one commonality between a magician and a soccer player. They both do hat tricks.
Scrambled eggs are similar to a losing basketball team because both are beaten.
. What do you call it when you heard the same jogger pun earlier, yet laughed again?
A running joke.
Golf balls are like eggs…
They’re white, they are sold by the dozen, and a week later you have to buy more.
We’ll kickoff the party with some cocktails.
What type of noodles do swimmers like best?
Pool noodles!
What time should I book the court? Let’s shoot for around tennish.