Funny Sports Puns

If you love sports and laughing - there is no better place to be than our sports puns section!

Funny Sports Puns

For instant fun, just add water.
How do ski instructors get to work?
By icicle.
The soccer player brought string to her game because she wanted to tie the score.
I got so mad at my partner hitting moonballs, I had to pusher off the court.
What is the 7th pin in bowling called? Mother-In-Law!
Basketball players are not that patient to follow-through an elaborate court-ship procedure.
The game of golf is 90-percent mental…
And 10-percent mental.
Wife: I’m sick and tired of your obsession with golf!
Husband: Why, is it driving a wedge between us?
How do you call stage diving at Oktoberfest?
Krautsurfing.
Both tournament directors published the schedule at the same time. It was a draw.
Why did the volleyball player get thrown out of the party? He spiked the punch.
What's the best advice to give to a young baseball player?
If you don't suceed at first, try second base.
My wife drove our German car off the pier into the sea. The next day I went diving to look for it.
I got the Benz.
Why did the kid pursue scuba diving?
Because all his grades are below C-level.
What do you call a small fish magician? A magic carpet
Why can't you tell a joke while ice fishing? Because it'll crack you up!.
Which football playoff team are Star Trek fans rooting for ?
The Green Bay Picards.
Where do baseball players wash up?
In the bat tub.
What do you get when you run behind a car?
Exhausted!
Which Finn is like a hotdog on the ice? Teemu Salami.
The ref keeps shafting us the offsides; I think he's blue lyin'.
Why did the volleyball player not want to travel? Because he had been there and dug that.
Did you hear about the Owl that could play American football?
It was a superb_owl.
How can you tell when a coach doesn’t know what they are doing? When the real coach is yelling from in the stands.
Why do so few vegetarians become competitive swimmers?
They don’t like the swim meats!
What do you call a diving dog?
A sub woofer.
I’m icing the kicker – and by kicker, I mean beer.
I know my shot was in. But I won’t argue, because I’m not up for the challenge.
Is the pool safe for diving?
It deep ends.
You cannot get a basketball game fairly officiated in the jungle because cheetahs are all over.
What does a basketball player say when he misses?
Shoot!
Who directs all of the movies about volleyball injuries? Spike Lee.
Why is Cinderella bad at soccer?
Because she’s always running away from the ball.
Why are nuns such great sprint runners?
'Cause they're used to being chaste.
Why don't skeletons play baseball?
Because they don't have the heart for it.
The reason why soccer players are brilliant in math is because they know how to use their heads well.
As a Brit, I can't get into American football
They rugby the wrong way.
Guy: Have you ever been fishing before? Girl: Why? Boy: I think we should hook up!
Hope you’re wide open on [date].
The only time a basketball team can chase a baseball team is five after nine.
We’re calling your number.
What do runners eat before a big race?
Fast food.
Bowlers do not make good employees. This is because for 80% of the time, they are always going on strike.
Do you believe this? All soccer players, irrespective of their country of origin, have one goal.
What did the football player say to his Chinese son
Go Long!
What did one hillbilly say to another? I got a new fly rod and reel for my wife. Best trade I ever made.
What can you serve and never eat? A volleyball!
Why do stoner tourists spend so much money while on a skiing holiday at Aspen?
Because they're high rollers!
The closer we came to the alley, the louder the bowling thunder.
What is the difference between a Yankees fan and a dentist?
One roots for the Yanks, and the other yanks for the roots. OUCH.