What kind of money snowmen use in the North Pole?
Cold cash!
If you live in an igloo made of snow, what’s the worst thing about global warming?
No privacy!
Why did the sapling jump in the ocean? He wanted to swim with the manatrees.
What do trees write on? Loose leaf paper.
What did the flower say to his wife when he brought her home a present?
I hope thistle cheer you up.
What is bigger than a Christmas tree?
A Christmas four
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
Frost bite.
A mycologist is the most ethical type of scientist. They follow morels closely.
What do you see when an elephant hides behind a tree?
The trunks
What type of motorcycle do London Plane trees like to ride? Treeumph.
What type of car did the mushroom drive by in? A spores car.
Where do the mushroom family keep their umbrellas, coats and shoes? In their porch-ini!
Why was the pine tree always in trouble? It kept being knotty.
What did the flower do when she was challenged?
Rose to the occasion.
What did the tree say after someone hit it? We should really call the copse.
Where does a snowman keep his money?
In a snow bank.
Can you tell me what type of weeping tree this is? Yes, but you willow me one later.
Farmers were in an all out war to decide which vegetable they would plant
It was resolved with a Peas Treaty.
Why do flowers always drive so fast?
They put the petal to the metal.
What did the rock say after it rolled into a tree? Nothing because rocks can’t talk.
What sort of cakes do snowmen like?
The ones with thick icing!
Why do trees always hold grudges? Because they never fir-get.
What types of plants do you get after you plant kisses? Tulips.
What did Sherlock Holmes say when he caught the Christmas tree bandit? It was elemen-tree, my dear Watt-son.
What does a door to door flower salesman do?
Petal his wares.
What sort of ball doesn’t bounce?
A snowball!
Why are trees such great thieves? They really have sticky fingers.
What did the snowman order at Wendy’s?
A Frosty.
How does a penguin build a house?
Igloos it together.
I told my friend a tree pun.
He was stumped.
What do you call a dinosaur who sat on a cactus?
A megalo-sore-ass.
Getting my toy drone stuck in the tree isn’t the worst thing that happened to me today.
But it’s definitely up there.
Whats a bad flower pick-up line?
Lets put our tulips together?
What did the cactus wear with their suit?
A cactie.
The forager was in such mixed moods this morning and we guessed he picked and ate the wrong class of mushrooms.
What does the birch like to study in school? Chemistree.
Did you hear the joke about the elephant who was stuck in a tree last spring? To get down, she had to sit down on a branch and wait until fall.
What does the youngest flower child say?
Last bud not least!
What did the Jedi tell the sacred tree? May the forest be with you.
What did the tree do when it found that the bank had closed? It starts a new branch.
What is the favorite Mexican food of snowman?
Brrrr – itos.