What do you get if you cross a witch with a werewolf?
A mad dog that chases airplanes!
What sound does it make when an ogre eats a witch for breakfast?
Snap cackle n' pop
Why do ghosts and demons get along so well? Demons are a ghoul’s best friend.
What’s a skeleton’s favorite plant?
A bone-zai.
What is a zombie that speaks two languages?
Zombilingual.
Sad to hear that Baron von Frankenstein has given up on his dream of being an actor.
He couldn’t get the parts.
Why did the ad agency hire a hydra?
She knew how to wear many different hats.
Where is the ghost going on holiday the next year? Lake Eerie.
What kind of writer did the ghost hire to write his biography? A ghostwriter, duh.
What did the last of the zombies say to the survivers of the apocalypse?
- It’s been a living hell with you guys around.
What did daddy ghoul say to his youngest son?
Stop ghouling around!
Why did the monster call his werewolf “Frost”?
Because frost bites!
What kind of vehicle does Bigfoot drive?
A big toe-truck.
What did the ghost do at the red light? He came to a dead stop.
The zombie astrologer writes really scary predictions.
They're horror-scopes.
What was the most common game played by Greek Gods?
Hydra and seek.
What do you call a one-inch zombie?
Tomb thumb!
What’s a zombie’s favorite toy?
A dead-y bear.
Please stop making jokes about little people
How would you feel if a bunch of giants made jokes about you?
Where are werewolf movies made?
Howl-lywood.
Why did Dr. Frankenstein hire Igor as his assistant?
He had a hunch about him.
What do you call a sketchy looking Bigfoot?
A Susquatch.
What do you get when you cross a werewolf and a vampire?
A fur coat that fangs around your neck.
What do you call a herd of undead llamas?
The zombie alpacalypse.
Why do vampires always dress so nice?
Because they’re so vein!
What do you get when you cross a vampire bat and a computer?
Love at first byte.
What kind of pet fish did the skeleton have?
A bonefish.
What did the witch do when her broomstick broke?
She witch-hiked.
Why are Minotaurs always broke?
Because their loan sharks are always milking them dry!
Werewolves love their fast food.
What do you call a small Minotaur?
A Minitaur.
Why did the zombie comedian get booed off stage?
Because the jokes he told were rotten.
Why wouldn’t the ghost eat liver? He didn’t have the stomach for it.
Where is the Ghost’s bedroom located? Down the Hall-oween.
Witches always fly on broomsticks because they want to make a clean getaway.
What’s a skeleton’s next favorite rock band?
Bone Jovi.
What is a Ghost’s favourite treat? Ice-scream floats.
Frankenstein’s monster was really worried one day.
“Pull yourself together”, said Frankenstein.
How did the archeologists know the skeletons were real?
They were bone-afide.
What is black, white and dead all over?
A zombie in a tuxedo.
I heard Medusa looked really pretty.
In fact, her looks were stunning.
I used to fear giants.
Now I look up to them.
Why did the skeleton put on a heavy coat?
He was chillled to the bone.
Tne thing you won't catch a vampire ordering in a restaurant is a stake sandwich.
Many people think that the Abominable Snowman doesn't exist...
Yeti does.
What do you call it when witches are optimistic about the future?
Witchful thinking.
Did you hear about the witch who got plastic surgery?
She looked really good afterworts.
What kind of noise does a witch’s vehicle make?
Brrrroooom, brrroooom.
Yetis have declared their own independent state in the Himalayas.
It's an abomi-nation.
What happens when Bigfoot gets lost in the fog?
He is mist!