Why are Minotaurs always broke?
Because their loan sharks are always milking them dry!
What do you call a male witch?
Mitch
What kind of fish do skeletons like to eat?
Carpals.
What did the zombie say after seeing his neighbor’s new car?
- I’m green with envy!
How did the witch invite the wizard to take an evening ride on her broomstick?
Voodoo like to ride with me?
What did Dr. Frankenstein say when Pinocchio’s nose grew?
IT’S A LIEEEEE!!
What did the witch get her cat for entertainment?
A cat-alog.
A werewolf's favorite day of the week is Moonday.
What kind of birds do skeletons like?
Sea skulls.
What kind of hat does a skeleton wear at Easter?
A Bone-et.
What do you call a silly werewolf in Australia ?
A dingo-ling
What did the giant say after he ate Fiji?
- I want Samoa!
Why didn’t the zombie stay in town?
There was a new head strong sherif in town!
I met an annoying squid who wanted to become a comedian.
He wouldn’t stop kraken jokes.
Which soccer position does a Ghost play? Ghoulkeeper, of course.
What do you get when you cross a goblin, a stop sign, and immortality?
An everlasting gobstopper!
I used to be a werewolf but I’m ok noooooooooooow!!
Sasquatch often gets mistaken for Bigfoot.
Yeti never complains.
What’s a vampire’s favorite type of dog?
A blood hound.
What's the similarity between a sailor and a thief?
Both have a phobia for sirens.
What do you call a ghost of a man with a broken leg? A hobblin’ goblin.
What do you call a zombie with lots of kids?
A mom-ster.
Why did the poor werewolf chase his own tail?
He was trying to make ends meet.
What do you call a werewolf that can’t decide what to wear?
A what-to-wear-wolf.
How do Yetis tell the time?
With a sasq-watch.
Where do school-going vampires carry their books?
In bat-packs.
What advice do ghosts give their children? Only spook when spoken to.
What did daddy ghoul say to his youngest son?
Stop ghouling around!
What does the skeleton chef say when he serves you a meal?
- Bone Appetit!
How did Frankenstein know Jesus was coming for a visit?
He used his frankincense.
What happened to the skeleton who sat by the fire for too long?
He became bone dry.
What do you call a zombie in pajamas?
The sleepwalking dead.
What do witches in Australia ride?
Broomerangs.
I met a French vampire who had an attention deficit problem. We called him Drac..ooh la la!
What do you call the last skeleton on earth?
The end-o skeleton.
Witch you were here.
I feel like Medusa was in some rocky relationships.
What is a Ghost’s favourite film? Paranormal Activity.
Where do fashionable ghosts shop for sheets? Bootiques.
Why was the skeleton a success at work?
He had a head for business.
What job on a construction site is best suited to a skeleton?
Cranium operator.
Where did the ghost go on holiday? The Boohamas.
What did the ghost buy at the bar? Boos!
Why did the skeleton go to the dance?
To see the boogie man.
What part of the military do zombies serve in?
The marine corpse.
This zombie kept cutting the line so I gave her a piece of my mind.
She said it was yummy.
What did the giant say to Jack when he caught him sneaking around his castle?
"Have you bean stalking me?"
What did the zombie bank robber say to the cops?
- You'll never take me alive.
Why did the troll fall back with his army?
He didn't want to be ogre-run by the enemy.
How does Frankenstein eat his dinner?
He bolts it down.