What happened when the monster's football game was all tied up?
They went into ogre time.
What do you call a herd of undead llamas?
The zombie alpacalypse.
What do you call a sleeping werewolf?
An unaware-wolf.
What do ghosts use to keep their hair in place? Scare-spray!
What is a witch's favorite ride at the fair?
A scary-go-round.
The best place to search for information about witches is wicca-pedia.
What do troll mathematicians like to solve?
Parabolems?
What crosswords do zombies like?
Crypt-ic ones.
How do werewolves stop a video?
They press the paws button.
A monster terrorized a village.
He kept doing it ogre and ogre again...
Why did Frankenstein tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
He didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills!
What does a werewolf say in church?
Howleluia!
Who is the most famous skeleton detective?
Sherlock Bones.
What kind of writer did the ghost hire to write his biography? A ghostwriter, duh.
What do skeletons hate the most about the wind?
Nothing. It goes right through them.
Why is the air so clean and healthy on Halloween?
The witches sweep the sky.
What do vampires use when baking cakes?
Batter.
What do you call a werewolf with no legs?
Anything you like – he can’t chase you.
Why did the witch's team lose the cricket game?
Their bats flew away.
What is a Ghost’s favourite treat? Ice-scream floats.
How do zombies introduce themselves?
- Pleased to eat you.
What do witches in Australia ride?
Broomerangs.
Did you hear about the giant who threw up?
It's all over town!
What do you call a very active hydra?
Hydradynamic.
What do you call a lineup of food with lots of garlicky dishes?
Buffet the Vampire Slayer!
What do you get when you cross a vampire bat and a computer?
Love at first byte.
How does a Ghost say good-bye? - I can’t wait to seance you again.
Why was the skeleton scared of the baby?
Because he was an ankle biter.
What is the difference between a deer running away and a small witch?
One is a hunted stag and one is a stunted hag!
How does Frankenstein speak?
Frankly.
What do you call a hairy beast that no longer exists?
A were-wolf!
What’s a vampire's favorite fruit?
A neck-tarine.
Yetis have declared their own independent state in the Himalayas.
It's an abomi-nation.
Did you hear about the ghoul who had eight arms?
He was very handy!
Stealthy minotaurs are always camooflauged.
What kind of chocolate do ghouls like?
Hearse-sheys!
What did the tired witch do?
She sat down for a spell.
What is black, white and dead all over?
A zombie in a tuxedo.
Where does a Portuguese skeleton live?
Lis-bone
What do a witch and a candle have in common?
They're both wicked.
What do you call a skeleton who goes out in the snow?
A numb-skull.
What kind of key does a ghost use to unlock his room? A spoo-key.
Take a vampire to a bar, and you don't need to ask what he wants to drink. He'll have a Bloodweiser.
What kind of birds do skeletons like?
Sea skulls.
The bartender told the ghost they don't serve spirits after midnight.
The troll told his girlfriend that he was head ogre heels for her.
When they want to relax, ghosts have a boo-ble bath.
Why did the werewolf need to talk with the skeleton?
He had a bone to pick with him.
Why aren't there more Bigfoot jokes?
There are, but they're really hard to find!
What do you call a dull ghost? Boo-ring!