What did the giant say after he ate Fiji?
- I want Samoa!
What do you call a nervous witch?
A twitch.
What kind of vehicle does Bigfoot drive?
A big toe-truck.
Heard a rumor of a giant butterfly in London. Probably just an urban moth.
How do French skeletons say hello?
- Bone-jour!
I found out yesterday that the Mexican dish ghosts like the most is a boo-ritto.
What did the broken hearted skeleton say?
After all to-marrow is another day.
Where do zombies go for beach holidays?
The Dead Sea.
What do you call a werewolf escapologist?
Hairy Houdini.
Who will Frankenstein’s monster take to the dance?
Any old girl he can dig up.
Why do ghouls like ice cream?
Because it’s ghoulilicous!
What do you call a clever monster?
Frank Einstein.
Why did the witch go to the doctor?
She had a dizzy spell.
What was the inscription on the tomb of Frankenstein’s monster?
HERE LIES FRANKENSTEIN’S MONSTER. MAY HE REST IN PIECES.
What happened when the monster's football game was all tied up?
They went into ogre time.
What did the angry witch do after sitting on her broomstick?
She flew off the handle.
Why don’t vampire’s make good artists?
Because all they draw is blood.
How can you tell that vampires love baseball?
They turn into bats every night.
What's the Kraken gonna give you that'll make you laugh uncontrollably?
Ten Tickles!
What do troll mathematicians like to solve?
Parabolems?
I used to fear giants.
Now I look up to them.
What type of art do skeletons like?
Skulltures!
What did the mummy say to the zombie?
- Stop ragging on me!
Why did the kraken eat 5 ships that were carrying potatoes?
Because nobody can eat just one potato ship.
In the night, a visitor came past my igloo. It was a yeti!
Not sure who left the other cooler, but thanks!
What does the iron-deficient giant say?
- Fi fo fum.
What part of the military do zombies serve in?
The marine corpse.
What do you call a fast broomstick?
A vroom-stick.
Why do witches not wear a regular hat?
Because there's no point in it.
What’s the best time for Frankenstein to go to a party?
Fright now.
What do they call Bigfoot in Europe?
Bigmeter.
What do you call the Frankenstein of the Gardening world?
An A-botan-ation.
What do you call a witch who drives badly?
A road hag.
I met an annoying squid who wanted to become a comedian.
He wouldn’t stop kraken jokes.
What do you get when you cross a ghoul and a vampire?
A hemogoblin.
Frankenstein’s monster was really worried one day.
“Pull yourself together”, said Frankenstein.
Why do witches only ride their broomsticks at night?
That's the time to sweep.
What do skeletons say when they set off to sea?
- Bone voyage!
What would you call a vampire who is into finance?
Account Dracula.
Did you hear about the ghoul who had eight arms?
He was very handy!
What do you call it when Dr. Frankenstein makes tea?
A monstrositea.
What do you call a werewolf that's found the cure for lycanthropy?
A lycan'tthrope.
The local vampire society is constantly growing. They are always looking for new blood.
What happens when a ghost gets lost in the fog? He is mist.
What is the highest compliment a zombie can receive?
- Wow, you're in Grave condition!
Which car is a Ghost’s favourite? It is between a Boogatti or a Rolls-Royce Phantom.
When they want to relax, ghosts have a boo-ble bath.
What kind of pet fish did the skeleton have?
A bonefish.
What did the Japanese skeleton put in his sushi?
Bone-ito flakes.
What did Dr. Frankenstein say when Pinocchio’s nose grew?
IT’S A LIEEEEE!!