Funny Pick Up Lines

Horrifically bad and funny pick up lines from men and from women

Funny Pick Up Lines

Feel my shirt. Know what it’s made of? Wifey material.
Even my new stainless steel cookware set isn't as slick as you.
Wanna have a bath with me.. you can play with my rubber dickie.
My feelings of love for you are like the stars in the sky. They're probably long dead.
Knock knock!

Who's there?

Ike.

Ike who?

Ike can rock your world, baby.
Are you from the U.K.? Because I want U, K?
What's a nice girl like you doing in a dirty mind like mine?
If you were a laser, you'd be set on stunning.
They say Disney World is the happiest place on earth, obviously, they haven't been in your arms.
Are you bad WiFi?
Because I'm feeling no connection here.
When I log my run in my journal today, it will say I ran with my future wife today.
It's been a hard day's night without your lovin', Oh darling.
I know your name is Savan-nah, but if I asked you out to drinks, could that be a Savan-yeah?
Man: I'm a photographer. I've been looking for a face like yours.
Woman: I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours.
You’re like my coffee, you keep me up all night.
I want to be a drop of your blood, so I could travel your body and sleep in your heart.
When I count my blessings, I make sure to count you twice.
I used to go out with a homeless girl, like you. It was great. I could drop her off anywhere.
Can you give me directions to your heart? I've seemed to have lost myself in your eyes.
Oof – is the Erin here really fresh or is that just you?
You’re as beautiful as a flower, but I think I rose to the challenge.
You'll never be as well dressed as I, but I'm willing to give you second place.
I'd be Lyon to myself if I said I thought we weren't meant to be.
When God made you, he was just showing off.
Hey I love your shoes, they would look even better if they were running alongside me.
How about a little roll in the Bakery Department?
Give me your number so I can make the call.
Roses are red, violets are blue. There’s nothing in the world more prettier than you.
Wanna go explore some celestial bodies together?
Is your name Summer? Because you are hot!
Woah, that attractive field of yours is pulling me in! By any chance, are you a Van de Graaff generator?
Roses are red, violets are blue. My heart began to beat when I first saw you.
You'd make for some real smooth sailing
Are you a campfire? Cause you are hot and I want s’more.
The first time ever I saw your face I thought the sun rose in your eyes
Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because you obviously landed on your face.
Do you believe in love at first flight?
Hey baby, wanna witness a gamma ray burst?
Hello... I've been admiring your bacterial signature.
Hey girl, you won’t need the Rosetta Stone to translate my love for you.
I know somebody who likes you but if I weren’t so shy I would tell you who.
Knock knock!

Who's there?

When where.

When where who?

Tonight, my place, me and you.
Do you like my cologne? It’s derived from the musk gland of the industrious beaver.
Ever wonder what's happening under Orion's belt?
Girl, you must be a possessive pronoun because I think you're mine.
Your Zygomaticus Major is the best thing that I have witnessed.
Your fragrance lights up my life.
Were you raised in captivity? Because you captured my heart.
Do you believe in love at first set? Or should I curl this barbell another 10 times?
I'm actually way hotter than poutin.