Funny Pick Up Lines

Horrifically bad and funny pick up lines from men and from women

Funny Pick Up Lines

I was supposed to solve for X. I am so glad that I found U instead.
Got plans for leftovers, yet?
Is your name Summer? It has to be, because you're hot!
You've got great posture. I'd love to see you flow sometime.
Call me miles because I want you to complete me every round.
Can you hold my gloves for a second? I usually warm them by the fireplace, but you are way hotter.
How about I land my space shuttle in your International Space Station?
Roses are red

Violets are blue

But I don't care

Cause I'm leaving you.
Excuse me, could you point me toward the Self-Help section? I need some advice on how to approach a gorgeous guy in a bookstore without seeming creepy.
Help me score one more time for team Canada?
It took God seven days to make the world but it'll only take seven digits for you to change mine.
Hey sugar-buns, do you play Center? Wanna be the center of my attention?
Belize me, baby, I will Peru'v my love for you at any Cost.
"It's not because I don't like you, it's because I hate you."
We’re not socks, but we make an excellent pair.
You're embarrassed by my dense pickup lines? OK, I won't continuum. I'll be more discrete.
I wanna grow old together. I will stay with you even after I'm sixty-four!
I’d love to spend some time Matthew
I've got some wicked feelings brewing for you.
I know that 70% of the human body is composed of H2O, but the tall drink of water I'm looking at is probably 97%.
Drowning doesn't seem too bad if you would give me mouth-to-mouth.
My name? It's Bond. Covalent Bond.
I’m trying to find a date for this weekend…do you Noah guy?
My hypothalamus must be secreting serotonin right now because you’re making me happy!
I want to live in your socks so I can be with you every step of the way.
Your treat or mine?
You like curling? Check out me curling my biceps!
Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: you.
My entire family keeps asking why I’m still single. Want to help me change that?
I'm no organ donor, but I'd be happy to give you my heart.
Date a hockey player, we always wear protection.
I thought happiness started with an H. Why does mine start with U?
I'm just like a dumpling. I have fillings for you.
I know somebody who likes you but if I weren’t so shy I would tell you who.
Can I hold your hand?
Are you a human? Just making sure.
Ever kiss a guy with no teeth?
I can keep increasing the resistance on my bike, but I just can't resist you.
How about we skip the hors d oeuvres and head straight for the digestif?
Is your name Ariel? Because I think we mermaid for each other.
Can I bother you for an aspirin tablet? Just looking at you from across the room is giving me heart-related pains.
Roses are red, bananas are yellow, wanna go out with a nice little fellow?
Do those legs go all the way? Because you should use them to go away.
You must be Australian because you've turned my life upside-down.
Are you made of beryllium, gold, and titanium? Because you are BeAuTi-ful.
Just call me your baby, cause I wanna be inside you for the next 9 months.
You remind me of a diamond necklace because you sure sparkle and shine bright.
Were you raised in captivity? Because you captured my heart.
Sorry, I had a pick up line for you but I got so distracted by your beauty.
Baby, I'm like efavirenz. I can decrease your odds of nightmares, but you still may have strong vivid dreams about me — a very common side effect.