Funny Pick Up Lines

Horrifically bad and funny pick up lines from men and from women

Funny Pick Up Lines

You're like baseball: A thinkin' man's game.
Hold the sugar, please. You're sweet enough for me.
You're as hot as a desert summer.
(give a dozen plastic roses) "I'll stop loving you, when these roses die.
Let’s make like a banana and split.
Nurse, can I have a little sugar to help the medicine go down?
Is Spotify down? Well the music in my house is now up. Wanna come by and listen to records?
Is your body from McDonald's? Cause I'm lovin' it!
Tell me of this thing you humans call... (dramatic pause) love.
So I was reading my bible the other day and I was wondering if you know what Paul meant by "Greet one another with a holy kiss?"
Boy, are you Elvis Presley? Because lord almighty I feel my temperature rising
The khaki in my shirt brings out the color in your eyes.
Are you a customs agent? I feel like I need to declare my love to you.
Is there an excessive heat warning or am I just hot for you.
Are you a box of BD pen needles? Because you are ultra-fine.
Girl you are like the sweet song of a choir.
Are there people following you?
Because I'm seeing someone behind your back.
My ex-girlfriend is like the square root of -1,.... she's imaginary.
Hey girl. Are you a beaver cuz damn.
Want to get some air? You took my breath away!
Hey Girl are you my checked in luggage? 'Cause I’d wait an eternity for you at the airport.
Hey, are you Oscar? Because I really want to win you...
"I just can't live with the pathetic tickles that you call thrusts anymore."
My feelings for you are Mont-real.
Hey, I just got my flight number. I’m just missing your phone number.
My favorite element on the periodic table is Uranium, because I am in love with U.
What a great match!..I hope when you see my message you don’t give it Ah-big-ail no and leave me hanging
I saw you on Spotify so thought to text you. You were in the hottest singles this week.
I was reading the book of numbers yesterday, and I realized I don’t have yours.
When God made you, he was just showing off.
Hi, you’re so beautiful you made me forget my pick up line. Would you settle for just flowers?
Are you Christmas? Because I want to Merry you.
Excuse me, do you have a pen?
Then you'd better get back to it before the farmer notices you're gone.
Excuse me, may I have this mating dance?
Could you tell me the oxidation state of this atom and your phone number?
Come, let’s measure the coefficient of friction between us.
The Grinch may have stolen Christmas, but you stole my heart.
Is your name Succinylcholine? Because you’re paralyzing.
I give roughing a whole new definition.
You're like my drug - when I'm with you, I feel Absinthe-minded.
You're like milk, I want to make you a part of my complete breakfast.
I'm no organ donor, but I'd be happy to give you my heart.
Hey baby, are you my flight? Because I wish I could catch you.
If a flower grew every time you’d cross my mind, I’d have a field of flowers.
Let's commit the perfect crime, I'll steal your heart and you'll steal mine.
Do you play the guitar? Because you can touch strings of my heart
Did you just fart?
Why, because I blew you away?
No, because you smell like sh*t.
I hope you're ready to spend some koalaty time together.
Daniel? More like Daaammnnn-iel
You know, less teeth means more tongue.