Funny Pick Up Lines

Horrifically bad and funny pick up lines from men and from women

Funny Pick Up Lines

Hey girl, you must be a math book because you’re full of problems.
Sorry lady, I'll have to eat you after dinner.
Because you're a snack!
Has anyone ever told you that your eyes are as clear as crystal? Because I can see straight into your soul.
Do you like short love affairs? I hate them - I've got all weekend.
The best Sunday I can think of?
You, me, a good movie, and mimosas with no pants on...
Oh sorry, I meant bottomless mimosas.
What's a slut like you doing in a classy joint like this?
Can you teach me how to use this machine?
I’m a 30-60-90 triangle and you’re a 40-40-90 triangle – we’re just right for each other.
Roses are red, my face is too, this only happens when I cycle with you.
I like the way you espresso yourself.
How does it feel to be the only star in the sky?
I was born in the wild but for you I would be domesticated.
My coffee is really hot. But you're hotter.
Dominic Pick-Up Lines
Hey pretty lady, let me take you out on a first date in the snow. I promise I’m not a flakey person.
When I look into the Mirror of Erised, I see you giving me your number.
Belize me, baby, I will Peru'v my love for you at any Cost.
If you know a person's name: "Hi, [name]."
How did you know my name?
"Isn't every beautiful girl named that?"
I know you are a goalie but I hope you don’t stop me from scoring tonight.
Do you know what they say about hockey players? They can always find the opening!
Are you related to the sun? Because running into you just brightened up my day!
I need an Imodium because I can't hold in my love for you.
You're kind of ugly and fat. Lucky for you, I'm into those things.
Are you my homework? Because I’m not doing you, even though I should.
If I had to choose between breathing and loving you, I'd take my last breath to say "I Love You".
Is your name pronounced Ee-an, or Eye-an? I hope it’s the latter cuz I’ve got my Ian you
I don't care *how* many items you've got, baby, I could check you out all day long!
You remind me of a thunderstorm: positively striking.
Curling? More like curling up next to you in bed, am I right?
Easter? I hardly even knew her.
Girl is your name baseball? Cause I just want to hit it with you.
I think we'd make a cute pear.
I’m a fraction – be my other half.
Are you my Appendix? Because I have a funny feeling in my stomach that makes me feel like I should take you out.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
If I told you you have a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
Hey baby, I think I'm going blind. Because I can't see you anymore.
Can you hold my gloves for a second? I usually warm them by the fireplace, but you are way hotter.
Your eyes are so blue I feel like I'm in the sky when I'm with you.
I value my breath so it would be nice if you didn't take it away every time you walked past.
It's getting warmer and the snow is melting. Time for me to melt your heart.
Are you my new favorite song? Because I'd like to hear you on repeat.
Hello, allow me to hi-Jack this conversation
We must be a cast on a spiral fracture, girl. Because we’re on a serious break.
Baby, I'm like efavirenz. I can decrease your odds of nightmares, but you still may have strong vivid dreams about me — a very common side effect.
Aside from being single, what do you do for a living?
When I first saw you I looked for a signature, because every masterpiece has one.
My fridge is hotter than you.
Are you a time traveler? Because I absolutely see you in my future.
Hey baby are you a boxer? You should try it, because your one hell of a knock out!