Funny Pick Up Lines

Horrifically bad and funny pick up lines from men and from women

Funny Pick Up Lines

I hand out couple assists per game, but never landed on a dime like you
You look like you could use some hot chocolate... Well, here I am!
You must be a magician, because every time I look at you, everyone else disappears.
I'd like to eat breakfast with you.
Can I invite you to dinner?
I don’t want an apple a day because I don’t want you to go away.
Can I take your temperature? You're looking hot today.
Hello. Cupid called. He says to tell you that he needs my heart back.
Guess what I’m wearing? The smile you gave me!
I can love you more than a cowboy loves a fat calf.
Hey babe do you need crutches? Cause I can’t stand you anymore.
You're kind of ugly and fat. Lucky for you, I'm into those things.
Do you believe in love at first set? Or should I curl this barbell another 10 times?
Are you a member of a Girl Scout? Girl: No. Boy: Then why you knew how to tie my heart into knots?
Are you from Tennessee?
Because you look inbred.
Girl, you are so fine, I had to upgrade my graphics card just to admire your pictures.
This dog is beautiful. I see he takes after his owner.
Charles Dickens might have given you Great Expectations, but I can meet them.
If it weren’t for the summer sun, you’d be the hottest thing ever created.
I’m like the Jean Baptiste-Colbert of relationships. I never trade with anyone else.
Has Spotify contacted you yet? Because you are the hottest single in this club.
My magical watch says you aren’t wearing any panties. Oh, you are? It must be an hour fast!
If I was a chessboard, I'd be lucky to have a queen like you.
"So… Do you like cheese?"
- Duke, She’s The Man (2006)
Is your name pronounced Ee-an, or Eye-an? I hope it’s the latter cuz I’ve got my Ian you
Girl you are like the sweet song of a choir.
Repeat this as many times as you get rejected until you get the number. Works like a charm.
This match sure has me feeling Victori-ous
That elliptical isn't the only thing getting my heart rate up…
"You deserve better and so do I."
I’m a fraction – be my other half.
I can score from multiple positions.
Just call me your baby, cause I wanna be inside you for the next 9 months.
I froze some raspberries last summer. You're hot enough to defrost them.
I know, I’ll never have a chance with you but will you give me a chance to hear an angel talk?
Man: If your left leg was breakfast and your right leg was lunch, I wouldn't be able to resist snacking between meals.
Woman: If your left leg was yoga and your right leg was cycling, I wouldn't be able to resist kickboxing between classes.
Let's skip the Netflix on the sofa and go straight to chill in my bed.
Are you my Appendix? Because I have a funny feeling in my stomach that makes me feel like I should take you out.
Sorry to bother you, I think I dropped my heart here. Can you pick it up?
Hey, you're pretty and I'm cute. Together we'd be pretty cute
I have a connection to make, but first I want to connect with you.
With long legs like yours, you don't need high heels.
Can you feel our love blossoming into a stable relationship?
I’m like planet Neptune. I’m attracted to the gravitational pull from Uranus since it is so big, and I cannot lie.
You remind me of my last biking accident. Because I am going head over heels for you.
I wish this gym had a stationary bike built for two.
Can we still share a netflix account?
Are you an orphanage? Cause I wanna give you kids.
"Sorry I stopped contacting you. I had to go back to rehab."
My friend told me to come and meet you.
He said you're a really nice person. I think you know him.
Jesus, yeah that's his name.
Do you have to leave so soon? I was just going to poison your drink.