Funny Pick Up Lines

Horrifically bad and funny pick up lines from men and from women

Funny Pick Up Lines

Excuse me, I think I'm lost. Is this the bar or the musem? You're just a piece of art.
I'm lactose intolerant so please keep your cheesy pick up lines away from me.
How about you and I form a binary system?
My text tone is adorable! Message me, so you can hear it.
Do you have my other lung? Because I’ve been LUNG-ing for you.
Do I know you? Because you look a lot like my next girlfriend.
Excuse me, do you have a pen?
Then you'd better get back to it before the farmer notices you're gone.
If you were a flower, I would pick you.
You're so beautiful, I wish I could plant you and grow a whole field of you.
Brianna-st, on a scale of 1-10, how perfect was that pun?
You're embarrassed by my dense pickup lines? OK, I won't continuum. I'll be more discrete.
You remind me of Halley's Comet. I don't wanna see you again for another 74 years.
Hey sugar-buns, do you play Center? Wanna be the center of my attention?
I love dogs, you love dogs, it's just me or is there some real pet-tential here?
For that special cashier:
Since you're checking me out why don't we go to the movies?
Hey girl, are you gold? Because I'm in Au of your beauty.
Are you Google? Because you have everything I’m searching for.
Hey there cyclist, want to go on a morning ride?
Excuse me, may I have this mating dance?
Thank god I'm wearing gloves because you are too hot to handle.
Let's commit the perfect crime, I'll steal your heart and you'll steal mine.
You’re a perfect ten(t).
I may study semantics, but you're what gives my life meaning.
I bet you don’t talk to strangers. But, if you had my number in your phone book, we wouldn’t be strangers anymore.
Want to show me how to make steamy greens?
Are you doing Ananda Balasana, or are you just happy to see me, baby?
You sweep me off my feet!
Babe, all the trail leads straight to you.
You are astoundingly gorgeous, but I can tell that’s the least exciting thing about you. I’d love to know more.
The first time I saw your hiking boots, I knew we were sole-mates.
I hope you know CPR, baby because you take my breath away.
Knock knock.

Who's there?

My divorce attorney
Do you like the internet? Because I can put you on there if you come back to my place.
Are you the end of the pool? Because baby, I’d do anything to reach you.
Why don't you reach in and grab some popcorn?
I've got a Victrola in my bedroom. Want to listen to my Sinatra records together? We could slow dance
Did you alter my vestibular apparatus?! Because I keep falling over for you!
Just call me milk. I'll do your body good.
Ya gotta check it out. My water bed is full of beer.
You remind me of milk - cuz you're doin' my body good.
Baby, if you were words on a page, you’d be fine print.
Your name must be Calculus Homework, because I have no interest in doing you.
I heard there are names that can be impossible to make puns out of, say its not Zoey!
It's always a first class trip with me.
I don’t need to be a doctor to diagnose you with acute smile.
Girl you are looking so Jose-fine in those photos
You’re the gravy to my turkey.
You must be Saturn Because I feel attracted to you even when I’m a million miles away!
I love you more than my mom loves Céline Dion.
Are you a Pepsi? Because you're so-da-licious!