Funny Pick Up Lines

Horrifically bad and funny pick up lines from men and from women

Funny Pick Up Lines

Are you the Godiva store? Because you seem sweet and way too fancy for me.
Everyone knows Albert Einstein because of his research in physics. But most people don’t know about his brother who did research in monster making...
His name was Frank.
I know my math. And you’ve got one significant figure!
I want to stick to you like glucose.
Man: Are those space pants.
Woman: No!, They're softball pants because my ass is out of your league.
Girl, if you were a dinosaur, you'd be a Gorgeousaurus.
I'll neck ya like Hawko necks a beer!
Are you a microprocessor or are you etching to see me.
You're as hot as a desert summer.
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.
I'd be Lyon to myself if I said I thought we weren't meant to be.
Swiped for the dog, stayed for the human.
How much will $20 get me?
I like you so much that I’ll give you my real number. Not the fake ones I give to all the other guys.
Your shirt has to go, but you can stay.
Are you from Mars? ‘cuz I wanna explore you with curiosity?
Knock knock!

Who's there?

Butch.

Butch who?
Butch your arms around me and give me a hug.
Is your name Wi-fi? Because I'm really feeling a connection.
Unlike the Leafs, I will never let you down.
I’m winning this race to get your number. Are you game?
Please don’t go now. Else, I would have to go to the police station and report you to the cops. You just stole my heart.
(Staring at boxes of cereal) I treat all boxes with respect.
I can love you more than a cowboy loves a fat calf.
Is it hot in here or is this relationship suffocating me?
Roses are red, violets are black, why is your chest as flat as my back?
Do you want to be my doubles partner...for life?
Charles Dickens might have given you Great Expectations, but I can meet them.
If you were a laser, you'd be set on stunning.
We must be a cast on a spiral fracture, girl. Because we’re on a serious break.
I just had to come talk with you. Sweetness is my weakness.
Do you know what they say about hockey players? They can always find the opening!
I'm not a professional referee, but please can I have your name and number?
Your profile pic is so cute. The human isn't too bad looking either.
Salami get this straight, you've stolen my heart.
Hey, you can r’Eli on me to be a fun date
Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put you between F and CK
Woman: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put you before GLY
Do you prefer stiff or limp fishing rods?
You are the square to my root.
Sorry I didn’t get you any chocolates for valentines day...
But if you want something sweet,I’m right here
You can put your hands at my heart’s center.
Turn to the girl sitting next to you at the bar and say, "I'm not really this tall, I'm sitting on my wallet."
Do you have a name you want me to save you as on my phone or should I just put 'mine'?
I don’t want an apple a day because I don’t want you to go away.
I like you about 1/18 as much as I like a Pumpkin Spice Latte, which is to say “I love you forever, let’s get married.”
You must have a C3 convertase inhibitor because you’re impossible to complement. You’re already perfect.
What are the chances I open with a pun that’s so bad you Leah-ve me hanging?
Hide in the kitchen, hide in the hall. I will catch you.
Your name must be Coca Cola, because you're so-da-licious.
Are you a banana? Because I find you a-peeling
Whoever said that no one is perfect has never seen you.