Funny Pick Up Lines

Horrifically bad and funny pick up lines from men and from women

Funny Pick Up Lines

I’m feeling a little blue, do you think you could help al-Levi-ate my pain with a good date?
Are you an omelette? Because you’re making me egg-cited!
Would you like to come over for tea and crumpets?
If we were playing tennis, I'd let you score all the points so I'll always be in love.
Are you a Victoria's Secret model? Because heaven's missing an Angel.
I thought Happiness starts with H. But why does mine starts with U.
Are you an alien because you abducted my heart long ago.
Hey, can I borrow your water filter? Cause you’ve got me thinking impure thoughts.
I ain’t a personal trainer, but I can host a one-on-one workout !
We could do some cardio at your place
How much does a polar bear weigh? Less than you, I would guess.
In my own version of the periodic table of elements, the number one element is U.
"I treated this relationship like my diet, one cheat day a week."
All I want is to fill that vacuum in your heart.
You love dogs. I love dogs. I think we may just be the paw-fect match.
Are you the dog? Because your shit’s all over the lawn.
I can score from multiple positions.
Are you a beaver? Because I like your tail.
I would flirt with you, but I'd rather seduce you with my awkwardness From a distance.
I lost my teddy bear, can I sleep with you?
Damn girl, I must be reading a book because you are FINE print.
Call me the pace clock, cause you sure can count on me.
Can you run with me so I can tell my friends I've ran with an angel?
Hey what’s your favourite dessert? Mine’s e-Clairs
I need more than 140 characters to tell you how beautiful you are.
How many eyes does a spider have? Doesn't matter, cause all of them are on you.
If I had a dollar for every time I thought of you, I’d be in a higher tax bracket.
Was that an earthquake or did you just rock my world?
Are you a thief? Because you stole a year of my life.
We fit together like a gitch in a wedgie.
"Hey baby, are you being followed? Because I've been seeing people behind your back."
Hi, I’m a T-cell, and I’m here to protect you from everything.
Your presence gives meaning to my yoga practice and enlightenment.
Here's to a big opening weekend.
Hey baby are you American cheese because you come as a single now.
We may be two ships that pass in the night, but I must have your number before you Ceylon.
Hey did you know you can’t spell Dreamy without Amy?
Nice wrapping but I need to inspect it.
Are you the splash-and-dash? Because you've got my heart beating.
Would you allow me to experience what’s beyond your Event Horizon?
I'll be your farm boy if you'll be my Princess Bride.
You know, less teeth means more tongue.
I hate oranges. Will you be my main squeeze?
Want to get some air? You took my breath away!
Girl, you're so beautiful. I'd cross the Delaware River to be with you.
"You are adorable, mademoiselle. I study your feet with the microscope and your soul with the telescope."
― Victor Hugo, Les Misérables
So I was reading my bible the other day and I was wondering if you know what Paul meant by "Greet one another with a holy kiss?"
There are approximately 1,010,300 words in the English language.
But I could never string together enough words to properly express how beautiful you are.
You're my eggnog: sweet, chill, and delish.
Will you let me be the avocado in your turkey sandwich?
Baby, I'm like efavirenz. I can decrease your odds of nightmares, but you still may have strong vivid dreams about me — a very common side effect.