Damn! You're almost as hot as my sister/brother.
You're the thought that counts!
I love you so much that If you were suddenly on fire, I'd pee on you.
Are your parents retarded, 'cause you sure are special.
How much will $20 get me?
Are you a durian? Because you're a total snack, but you smell like rotting flesh.
I was just curious? Are you as good as all the guys say you are?
The fact that I'm missing some teeth only means that there's more room for your tongue.
Hey baby, you got any diseases? Want some?
Your eyes are as blue as toilet water.
For a fatty, you don't seem to sweat much.
How hot does your gas oven get?
Do you wanna come dance with the big bad wolf? [ No! ] Its okay, the other two pigs said no too!
Just call me your baby, cause I wanna be inside you for the next 9 months.
You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!
The last time I saw a body like yours, I was burying it in my basement.
My mom told me it would be good for my self-esteem if I asked out people who aren't conventionally attractive.
You look a lot like my next victim.
Are you Ebala? Because you melt my insides.
Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because you obviously landed on your face.
You look like trash, may I take you out?
Roses are red, violets are blue, Antarctica is hot compared to you.
You smell just like my mom, want to grab a drink?
Roses are red, violets are black, why is your chest as flat as my back?
Are you ice cream? Because your face looks like rocky road.
Do you have to leave so soon? I was just going to poison your drink.
You're kind of ugly and fat. Lucky for you, I'm into those things.
If you were even half as gorgeous as me, I'd consider sleeping with you.
You looking at me is making me turn as red as that roasted beet salad.
Are you the future? Because you're looking hopeless and bleak.
I just pooped in my bed. Can I sleep in yours?
You're like the neighbors' WiFi. Everyone wants to use you.
Hold still, there's a mosquito on your a$$.
Are you a human? Just making sure.
Since all the hot ones are already taken, this is going to be your lucky night!
Are you a booger? Because I want to pick you first.
I would ask you if you're tired from running through my mind all day, but from the looks of it, you don't do any running.
How are you still so fat when you've been running in my mind for so long?
I dreamt about you. You died.
Pies aren't the new cupcakes, baby. You are.
Honestly, I'm into necrophilia. Wanna come home and play dead?
I hear you're looking for a stud. Well, I've got the STD and all I need is you.
My love for you is like cancer, it just keeps growing and growing.
I'd drink your bathwater.
Are you an alarm clock? Because I want to kill you.
You know the more I drink, the prettier you get!
Hold still, there's a mosquito on your a$$.
I love you so much I would eat the corn from your poop.
I accidentally pooped in my pants. Can I get into yours?
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