If I could rewrite the alphabet, I would P on U.
I just pooped in my bed. Can I sleep in yours?
You look a lot like my next victim.
If you were even half as gorgeous as me, I'd consider sleeping with you.
I love you so much I would eat the corn from your poop.
Are you ice cream? Because your face looks like rocky road.
You looking at me is making me turn as red as that roasted beet salad.
Did you fall from heaven? Because so did Satan.
I'd drink your bathwater.
Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!
I would ask you if you're tired from running through my mind all day, but from the looks of it, you don't do any running.
You're like the neighbors' WiFi. Everyone wants to use you.
I dreamt about you. You died.
Are you a booger? Because I want to pick you first.
Do you have to leave so soon? I was just going to poison your drink.
On a scale of 1 to 10, how much do I smell like your mom/dad?
You smell. We should go take a shower together.
You look like trash, may I take you out?
Are you Ebala? Because you melt my insides.
My mom told me it would be good for my self-esteem if I asked out people who aren't conventionally attractive.
I like my partners, like how i like my fast-food meals. Extra-large!
I was just curious? Are you as good as all the guys say you are?
How much will $20 get me?
Hold still, there's a mosquito on your a$$.
How hot does your gas oven get?
How are you still so fat when you've been running in my mind for so long?
You're that ugly that if I could do myself, I wouldn't need you.
I accidentally pooped in my pants. Can I get into yours?
Are you an alarm clock? Because I want to kill you.
Are you a human? Just making sure.
Damn! You're almost as hot as my sister/brother.
You're kind of ugly and fat. Lucky for you, I'm into those things.
You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
Hold still, there's a mosquito on your a$$.
The last time I saw a body like yours, I was burying it in my basement.
Are you the future? Because you're looking hopeless and bleak.
I love you so much that If you were suddenly on fire, I'd pee on you.
I'm willing to lower my standards if you're going on a date with me.
You smell... We should go take a shower together.
Your eyes are as blue as toilet water.
I hear you're looking for a stud. Well, I've got the STD and all I need is you.
Is your mom a hooker? Cause I'm hooked on you.
Pies aren't the new cupcakes, baby. You are.
Hey baby, you got any diseases? Want some?
I bet your muffled screams are as cute as u.
You smell just like my mom, want to grab a drink?
Honestly, I'm into necrophilia. Wanna come home and play dead?
Do you want to be disappointed tonight?
How much does a polar bear weigh? Less than you, I would guess.
Is that a discharge in your underwear, or are you just happy to see me?
Go to BabaMail
