The mothership has returned and I must leave.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'd rather be dead than continue seeing you!
We should make like the Soviet Union and split up.
What did the weather reporter say to his wife?
“I hope it doesn’t rain, deer!”
Hey babe, how about I plan a romantic weekend get away, and while I’m gone you can pack your shit and GTFO?
Let’s make like an atom, and split.
Hey, remember back when we were a thing… Yeah… Good times.
You are so right. And I am so left.
You look like my future ex wife.
I see my future like how the Americans spell colour. Without u.
Hey, babe. I think it's time we take our relationship to the previous level.
Do you happen to know sign language? Because this is the last time you’ll hear from me.
Honey if I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put the letters "DON'T LOVE" in between I and U
It’s a good thing we’re bad at puzzles because there is no way we’re putting this shit back together.
Are you a New Years resolution? Because we stopped working out after the first two weeks
Hey babe, I think its about time we cancel our gym membership. We're not working out anymore
It’s not you – it’s me. I don’t like you anymore.
The Best Break Up Lines
Want to know a joke? Our relationship.
I’d better get a library card, because I’m checking out of this relationship.
What does a deer hang on its Christmas tree?
“Horn – aments.”
It's time to be like a kit-kat and split up.
Wanna see a magic trick? Abrakadabra, you're single now.
Hey baby, are you in a tunnel? Because we’re breaking up.
Our relationship is like my financial status: Broke.
Is it hot in here or is this relationship suffocating me?
Hey baby, you know what sounds good? You and me never speaking to each other again.
We're donion rings.
Hey babe, are you the Mcdonald's Ice Cream Machine, because you just aren't working for me anymore.
Girl, If you were a fruit you'd be a can't-elope.
Excuse me, I seem to have lost my phone number, can you do the same?
I think it would be hot if we f**ked other people. Exclusively.
Do those legs go all the way? Because you should use them to go away.
Hey, did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because honestly, Karen, you are a demon.
Here, look at this blank piece of paper for a second… I wrote every reason why we should stick together on it.
Are you a stop watch? Because our time is up.
I'm not gay but I'll learn.
What’s the difference between me and your socks? I’m not yours anymore.
Hey, let's hold a costume party. You can be a bank, and I can be alone!
Are you a dollar bill? Because you’re single.
Girl you're looking like a snack and I'm going on a diet.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Girl its been fun
But im leaving you
Roses are red, violets are blue, trash is dumped and so are you.
We need to cover more ground so we should split up.
Do you believe in love at first sight? How about misery after three years?
Roses are red
And you gotta go
Because I found out
That you is a ho.
Are you a fidget spinner? Because the last time I had fun with you was forever ago and I’m not really interested in touching you anymore. I’m pretty sure you were just a phase and now I’d really like to get you out of my house and forget it ever happened.
You looked better when I was drunk.
We should make like your parents and split.
I just can't take the bad s*x anymore.
It's not you...it's your taste in music.
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