Q: Why did the tornado take a break?
A: Because it ran out of wind!
What did one raindrop say to the other raindrop?
“My plop is bigger than your plop.”
A man went to the gym today and met up with his new personal rainer.
Humpty Dumpty had a terrible summer, but he sure had a great fall.
What is fog's favorite drink? Mountain Dew
A guy just walked into my store and bought a bunch of fog machines so I called the cops.
He must belong to an extreme mist organization.
There was a television channel ran by pets, the weather forecast was on and inclement weather was being predicted...
High chance of it raining cats and dogs, howling winds, and a possible purricane.
Why do sailors eat shellfish when rain is forecast?
It’s the clam before the storm.
What do you call it when you boil a water buffalo?
A mist steak.
Why don’t Native Americans like to do rain dances in April anymore?
Because April showers bring Mayflowers.
What do you call a bear that’s stuck out in the rain?
A drizzly bear.
What did fog do to make the captain angry? He mist the boat.
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Butter
Butter who?
Butter get an umbrella, it looks like it's going to rain!
Q: What’s the fastest way to make a skeleton?
A: Put a leper in a wind tunnel
The wind had such a great time. You could say it had a blast.
I was just telling my friend Michael Rains about my unfortunate allergy to my home-grown barley.
My grains give me migraines, Mike Rains.
What does Santa often say to Mrs Claus? Come and look at the rain-dear.
Q: What did Julius Caesar’s pet windmill say?
A: I came, I spun, I conquered.
This very fair weather actually makes me feel like a feather!
With the kind of weather, it was almost certain that the bride-to-be would get a hoarse throat as she walked through the rain into her bridal shower.
A man went to buy long underwear cause the weather was getting cold. The cashier asked " How long would you like them"
"From march to September", said the man.
When it was raining yesterday, I saw a man use ketchup and I got quite shocked. It is only later that I learnt he was taking advantage of the raining cats and hot dogs.
Why did Iron Man sleep outside when it rained?
To get some rust.
What is the difference between a wet day and a lion with a toothache? A wet day is pouring with rain, the other is roaring with pain.
What did the ghost knights say to the cloud king?
Our souls will rain forever.
What do you call it when two people make a baby in fog?
A mist conception.
Many people seem to believe that warm water droplets get cooled fast and form fog. It's a mist-conception. Someone should de-mist-ify it.
I mist say, this is a pretty bad joke, but it haze potential.
Sorry for raining on your parade, I really thought it'd be snow problem.
Everyone said the wind was powerful. So, I went outside and was blown away.
Q; What’s the difference between origami and grandpa passing wind?
A: One is the art of the fold, the other, the fart of the old.
What does a ghost wear when it’s raining outside?
Boooooooooooots.
My glasses fogged up once I came out of the AC room last summer, but I was okay because I was opti-mistic.
A man once said when is Monday coming? His wife said Mon-soon.
Mother always knows best. But when winter comes around, Mother Nature snows best.
I wanted to be a professional fortune-teller but I wasn't very good at it. I could only predict when there would be bad winter storms. Well, turns out I had been using a snow globe.
What did the baby cloud say to its mum when it rained? Sorry, mum, I couldn't hold it any longer.
Why are people in big cities in Spain always dry?
Because the rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain.
It was hot today and when I went outside I saw there was a line of guys standing outside the hairdressers. I thought to myself, "Such a lovely day to have a barber queue".
What is known as the world's wettest animal? Rain-deer.
Q: What did the tornado say to the sportscar?
A: I’m taking you for a quick spin!
Why do cows lie on each other in the rain?
To keep each udder dry.
Even during thunderstorms, Santa can still deliver presents because raindeers fly his sleigh.
Q: What is a wind turbine’s favorite musical group?
A: Air Supply
I'm going to discuss global warming on Sunday at a debate. It's a very heated topic.
When does soil get rich?
When mother nature makes it rain.
Q: Where can a tornado be jailed?
A: In a high pressure cell.
Why is rain the best kind of music?
Because it has amazing drops.
What should you do if it starts raining cats and dogs?
Please seek shelters.
A bunch of chill-dren from the neighborhood played all afternoon in the snow.