Q: Why couldn’t the boy keep his documents open when he left a window open in winter?
A: Because it was too Win+D
Q: What did the tornado say to the sportscar?
A: I’m taking you for a quick spin!
Two fish were swimming in a stream when it began to rain.
One fish said, “Quick, let’s swim under that bridge, otherwise we will get wet!”
Why are people in big cities in Spain always dry?
Because the rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain.
Ensure you save for the rainy day because even your closest friends can give you a cold shoulder.
When moving a piece of furniture at the weather station, you'll be needing four casters.
The queen’s favorite form of precipitation is the reign.
What do you call a negative fog?
A pessimist.
What’s a bigamist?
It’s what Italians call a thick fog.
Q: What did the leaf say to the wind?
A: You really blew me away.
Why do people like storm watching so much?
The lightning is quite striking!
My wife asked me, “Did you fog up the bathroom mirror again?”
I said, “I don’t see myself doing that.”
What is known as the world's wettest animal? Rain-deer.
There was a television channel ran by pets, the weather forecast was on and inclement weather was being predicted...
High chance of it raining cats and dogs, howling winds, and a possible purricane.
Q: How is hurricane season like Christmas?
A: At some point, there’s going to be a tree inside your house.
Q: Why does a hurricane wear a monocle?
A: It has only had one eye!
My glasses may be fogged up, but don’t worry I’ll be fine.
I’m optimistic!
What does a tornado wear under his clothes? Thunderwear!
I tried to catch the fog.
But I mist.
What was one raindrop overheard saying to another? Two's company, three's a cloud.
I wanted to be a professional fortune-teller but I wasn't very good at it. I could only predict when there would be bad winter storms. Well, turns out I had been using a snow globe.
Why do sailors eat shellfish when rain is forecast?
It’s the clam before the storm.
When can 3 elephants stand under 1 umbrella and not get wet?
When it’s not raining.
I over boiled some venison broth earlier.
It was deerly mist.
Even during thunderstorms, Santa can still deliver presents because raindeers fly his sleigh.
Q: Why does it smell bad when you destroy fans?
A: Because you’re breaking wind.
What does a spy do in the rain?
He goes undercover.
How can colors be used to predict the weather?
By their huemidity.
There are so many puppies and kitties around the neighbourhood. Perhaps it is because it has been raining cats and dogs for hours.
Q: What do you call a weatherman who farts while he pees?
A. Rain with a little wind and thunder.
Q: What do you call a freezing bird?
A: Brrrrrrrrrdddd
What is a tornado's favorite movie? Gone With the Wind!
What did one raindrop say to the other? Two's company, three's a cloud.
Mother always knows best. But when winter comes around, Mother Nature snows best.
My glasses fogged up once I came out of the AC room last summer, but I was okay because I was opti-mistic.
Why don’t Native Americans like to do rain dances in April anymore?
Because April showers bring Mayflowers.
Did you hear about the cow that was lifted into the air by a tornado? It was an udder disaster!
Q: What did Julius Caesar’s pet windmill say?
A: I came, I spun, I conquered.
What is an evil dictator’s favorite type of weather?
A rain of terror.
I'm saving for a rainy day, so far I've collected a couple of raincoats, an anorak, and a dinghy.
What do books wear on a wet and rainy day? Rain quotes.
What is fog's favorite drink? Mountain Dew
What do you call an English rock band playing in the mist? Foghat.
What does Santa often say to Mrs Claus? Come and look at the rain-dear.
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Butter
Butter who?
Butter get an umbrella, it looks like it's going to rain!
What's the wind's favourite colour?
Blew
What do you call a dinosaur that got stuck in the rain?
A driplodocus.
What did fog do to make the captain angry? He mist the boat.
Yesterday’s weather forecast predicted freezing rain. However, it turned out to be quite an ice day.
Because it was so foggy at my father’s funeral, he was buried in the wrong plot.
It was a grave mist-stake.