My love for you is like diarrhea. I just can't hold it in.
You smell just like my mom, want to grab a drink?
On a scale of 1 to 10, how much do I smell like your mom/dad?
Wow, you have a the chin of Superman. I bet you could take a serious punch.
I dreamt about you. You died.
I love you so much that If you were suddenly on fire, I'd pee on you.
I'm willing to lower my standards if you're going on a date with me.
Your eyes are as blue as toilet water.
I'd drink your bathwater.
Are you a human? Just making sure.
Excuse me, I just farted over there. Can I stand here with you?
Do you wanna come dance with the big bad wolf? [ No! ] Its okay, the other two pigs said no too!
Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!
Is that a discharge in your underwear, or are you just happy to see me?
I just pooped in my bed. Can I sleep in yours?
I accidentally pooped in my pants. Can I get into yours?
If I could rewrite the alphabet, I would P on U.
Roses are red, violets are black, why is your chest as flat as my back?
I bet your muffled screams are as cute as u.
Just call me your baby, cause I wanna be inside you for the next 9 months.
You smell. We should go take a shower together.
Are you Ebala? Because you melt my insides.
I would ask you if you're tired from running through my mind all day, but from the looks of it, you don't do any running.
Are you the future? Because you're looking hopeless and bleak.
My love for you is like cancer, it just keeps growing and growing.
You looking at me is making me turn as red as that roasted beet salad.
You look like trash, may I take you out?
You're kind of ugly and fat. Lucky for you, I'm into those things.
What's a slut like you doing in a classy joint like this?
I used to go out with a homeless girl, like you. It was great. I could drop her off anywhere.
The fact that I'm missing some teeth only means that there's more room for your tongue.
Since all the hot ones are already taken, this is going to be your lucky night!
You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
Are you a booger? Because I want to pick you first.
You look a lot like my next victim.
You're so fine that I wouldn't care if you were dead or alive!
You know the more I drink, the prettier you get!
I was just curious? Are you as good as all the guys say you are?
Pies aren't the new cupcakes, baby. You are.
Did you fall from heaven? Because so did Satan.
The last time I saw a body like yours, I was burying it in my basement.
Just like I never play with poop, I promise you that I will never play with your heart.
Are your parents retarded, 'cause you sure are special.
Are you an alarm clock? Because I want to kill you.
Is your mom a hooker? Cause I'm hooked on you.
Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because you obviously landed on your face.
If you were even half as gorgeous as me, I'd consider sleeping with you.
Do you want to be disappointed tonight?
I hear you're looking for a stud. Well, I've got the STD and all I need is you.
Hold still, there's a mosquito on your a$$.