How does a Ghost say good-bye? - I can’t wait to seance you again.
Why do ghosts like elevators? They raise their spirits.
Frankenstein's monster and the bride of Frankenstein sit down for dinner
Bride: How come you never help with the dinner
Frankenstein: I did
Bride: How?
Frankenstein: I did the mash...
Bride: Don't you dare
You know why vampires can raise ghouls?
Because they are neck romancers!
What sign was posted in the witches' parking lot?
Violators will be toad.
Why did the game warden arrest the ghost? No haunting license.
Why do witches not wear a regular hat?
Because there's no point in it.
What did the conductor say when he became a zombie?
Traaaaaaaaiiiinsss!!!
What sound do you hear when a Ghost explodes? kaBOOm!
These sea monster jokes are so funny.
They had me kraken!
What does a ghoul say when they wake up?
Gaaarrrh I love the smell of ghoul in the morning!
What do you call it when the Bigfoot in charge makes pasta for all the others?
Alpha Yeti Spaghetti!
How do you stop an Internet troll?
Seize their memes of production.
What do you call a very active hydra?
Hydradynamic.
What did the ghost teacher say to her class? - Look at the board and I’ll go through it, again.
What do you call a lie told by a skeleton?
A fibula.
Shrek isn't bad, but he's not that great either. I guess you could say he's medi-ogre.
Normal Zombies: BRAAINNNNSSS!!
Vegetarian Zombies: GRAAINNNNSSS!!
Body Builder Zombies: GAAINNNNSSS!!
Plumber Zombies: DRAAINNNNSSS!!
Conductor Zombies: TRAAINNNNSSS!!
Weatherman Zombies: RAAINNNNSSS!!
You hear about the werewolf who majored in philosophy?
Now he's a whywolf
Who does a witch call for help with computer problems?
Hex Support!
Don't get too close to a vampire, they have a serious case of bat breath.
Are sasquatches superstitious?
Yes, they always knock on wood!
The zombie worked for years to win this prize. He showed real dead-ication.
How should you greet a Ghost? - Long time, no see.
What cheese do vampires eat?
Munster.
What do you call a nervous witch?
A twitch.
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
What did the zombie bank robber say to the cops?
- You'll never take me alive.
How did the skeleton know it was going to rain?
He could feel it in his bones.
What would you call a vampire who is into finance?
Account Dracula.
What’s the best time for Frankenstein to go to a party?
Fright now.
Why doesn’t Frankenstein go on airplanes?
He can’t get past the airport metal detector.
The comedian ghost had everyone in stitches - he was dead funny.
Why are vampires like false teeth?
They come out at night.
What kind of key does a ghost use to unlock his room? A spoo-key.
What did one werewolf say when he saw his friend?
- Howl’s it going?
What do witches' cats like to have for breakfast?
Mice crispies.
Why was there no food left at the Halloween party?
Because everyone was a goblin.
Come witch me to the party.
How is Big Foot so good at rock climbing?
He always finds the biggest footholds.
Who's Denmark's greatest Zombie actor?
Rigor Mortissen
What do you call a silly werewolf in Australia ?
A dingo-ling
When does a skeleton laugh?
When someone tickles his funny bone.
Which ghost is the best dancer? The Boogie Man.
Where do werewolf go if their tails fall off?
A re-tail store.
What do skeletons complain about?
Aching bones.
What do you get when you cross a ghoul and a vampire?
A hemogoblin.
Why did the monster call his werewolf “Frost”?
Because frost bites!
Hear about the race between the Yeti and the Sasquatch?
The Sasquatch won, by a big foot.
What happens if a big ghoul steps on Batman and Robin?
They become flatman and ribbon!