Where is the Ghost’s bedroom located? Down the Hall-oween.
I’ve started dating Medusa recently.
Our relationship rocks!
What do you call a duck with fangs?
Quackula.
Why was the ghoul so smart?
He always ate brain food!
At the Italian restaurant, the ghoul ordered spook-ghetti for his main course.
Why did Frankenstein tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
He didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills!
What did the broken hearted skeleton say?
After all to-marrow is another day.
Why do girl ghosts go on diets?
So they can keep their ghoulish figures.
Who will Frankenstein’s monster take to the dance?
Any old girl he can dig up.
What's the similarity between a sailor and a thief?
Both have a phobia for sirens.
Was there a spark between Frankenstein and his bride?
Yes, he simply couldn’t resistor.
What do witches put on their bagels?
Scream cheese.
What type of candy sent the skeleton to the hospital?
Jawbreakers.
What time do werewolf Cowboys have a shootout?
High Moon!
What do you call a criminal vampire?
A fangster.
What do you call it when a monster gets mad?
Ogre-reacting!
Why don’t skeletons do well at sports?
Because they have no skin in the game!
What did the doctor say to the skeleton who had a temperature of 103 degrees?
- Looks like you are running a femur.
Why is the giant afraid of Jack?
Because Jack's beanstalking him.
Who is the most famous skeleton detective?
Sherlock Bones.
What advice do ghosts give their children? Only spook when spoken to.
What's the slogan for the New York Demon Chomping Advocacy Group?
Gobble the ghoul.
Why did the hotel staff dress as witches for Halloween?
Because they provided broom service!
What is a baby sasquatch's favorite toy?
His Yeti Bear!
What happened to the man who didn’t pay his exorcist? His house was repossessed.
The zombie's had some bad news.
He's looking very grave.
How do Yetis tell the time?
With a sasq-watch.
Why are Ghosts in such good shape? Plenty of exorcise and a good die-t.
The bartender told the ghost they don't serve spirits after midnight.
What kind of birds do skeletons like?
Sea skulls.
I found out yesterday that the Mexican dish ghosts like the most is a boo-ritto.
What's a zombie's least favorite quiz question?
A no-brainer.
What do you call a one-inch zombie?
Tomb thumb!
Why do skeletons hate the cold?
It sends chills up their spine.
When they want to relax, ghosts have a boo-ble bath.
How do French skeletons say hello?
- Bone-jour!
What do you call a bunch of zombie chickens?
The Bu-gawking Dead
What was the most common game played by Greek Gods?
Hydra and seek.
Vampires are not even real. Unless you Count Dracula.
Why did the mummy get a divorce?
His wife was a ghoul-digger who was just after his mummy.
Why did the ghoul become green?
It was sick of eating brains!
Who is a ghoul’s favorite family member?
Mummy!
How does a vampire keep fit?
Batminton.
How did Dr. Frankenstein pay the men who built his monster?
On a piece rate.
What is the Abominable Snowman's favourite type of cup?
A yeti.
How do you make a werewolf stew?
Keep him waiting until the full moon!
Vampires make awful businessmen. They just can't deal with the stakeholders.
Why are skeletons so good at chopping down trees?
They're LUMBARjacks!
What do they call Bigfoot in Europe?
Bigmeter.
- Hey, graduate student Minotaur, what are you up to today?
- Not much, just working on my Theseus.