How did Frankenstein know Jesus was coming for a visit?
He used his frankincense.
Why was Frankenstein’s monster always being arrested?
He was so easy to charge.
Frankenstein’s monster was really worried one day.
“Pull yourself together”, said Frankenstein.
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
What did one of Frankenstein’s ears say to the other?
I didn’t know we lived on the same block.
Why did Dr. Frankenstein hire Igor as his assistant?
He had a hunch about him.
Why did Frankenstein’s monster go to a psychiatrist?
He thought he had a screw loose.
Why is Frankenstein’s monster so popular?
He’s a real people person.
Why is Frankenstein always asking for help?
He’s looking for someone to give him a hand.
What’s the best time for Frankenstein to go to a party?
Fright now.
Why doesn’t Frankenstein go on airplanes?
He can’t get past the airport metal detector.
How does Frankenstein speak?
Frankly.
What did Dr.Frankenstein say when his monster spat on him?
It’s saliva!
Why did Frankenstein turn to solar?
For the free charge.
What happened when Frankenstein’s monster first met his girlfriend?
It was love at first fright.
Dr. Frankenstein must have been pretty buff.
He was a bodybuilder, after all.
How do you know Frankenstein is tired?
He’s dead on his feet.
Which musical group did Frankenstein not like at all?
The Village People.
Sad to hear that Baron von Frankenstein has given up on his dream of being an actor.
He couldn’t get the parts.
Who will Frankenstein’s monster take to the dance?
Any old girl he can dig up.
I love making new friends.
That’s why I studied under Dr. Frankenstein.
What happened when Dr. Frankenstein swallowed some uranium?
He got atomic ache.
What was the inscription on the tomb of Frankenstein’s monster?
HERE LIES FRANKENSTEIN’S MONSTER. MAY HE REST IN PIECES.
How did Dr. Frankenstein pay the men who built his monster?
On a piece rate.
Frankenstein entered a body-building competition…
And soon found he had seriously misunderstood the objective.
Who brings the monsters their babies?
Frankenstork.
Dr. Frankenstein just placed an order on Amazon.
It wasn't expensive, but I imagine the shipping cost him an arm and a leg.
What tree monster prowls the forest?
Frankenpine.
What’s Frankenstein’s favorite food?
Frankenfurters.
Frankenstein's monster and the bride of Frankenstein sit down for dinner
Bride: How come you never help with the dinner
Frankenstein: I did
Bride: How?
Frankenstein: I did the mash...
Bride: Don't you dare
What should you do when you see Frankenstein walking towards you?
Make a bolt for it.
What did Frankenstein say when he was struck by lightning?
Great! A jolt to the bolt!
What do you call a clever monster?
Frank Einstein.
What do you call it when Dr. Frankenstein makes tea?
A monstrositea.
What did Dr. Frankenstein say when Pinocchio’s nose grew?
IT’S A LIEEEEE!!
We all know Albert Einstein was a genius…
But his brother Frank was a monster.
Did you know Doctor Frankenstein used to be a lonely, lonely man?
Then he learned how to make friends.
People keep asking me why I’m working for Dr. Frankenstein.
I’m just trying to make a living.
What happened when the ice monster had a furious row with Frankenstein?
He gave him the cold shoulder!
What kind of dog did Frankenstein want for Christmas?
A lab.
Where does a thrifty Frankenstein get his limbs?
At the second-hand store.
What do you call the Frankenstein of the Gardening world?
An A-botan-ation.
What is Dr. Frankenstein’s favorite part of a company?
Human resources.
Why did Frankenstein’s monster give up boxing?
Because he didn’t want to spoil his looks.
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
Dr. Frankenstein: Igor, have you seen my latest invention? It’s a new pill consisting of 50 percent glue and 50 percent aspirin.
Igor: But what is it for?
Dr. Frankenstein: For monsters with splitting headaches.
What monster plays the most April Fool’s jokes?
Prankenstein!
Why is Frankenstein such good fun?
Because he soon has you in stitches.
Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?
His ghoul friend.
Was there a spark between Frankenstein and his bride?
Yes, he simply couldn’t resistor.