Why did Frankenstein’s monster go to a psychiatrist?
He thought he had a screw loose.
Who brings the monsters their babies?
Frankenstork.
Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?
His ghoul friend.
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
What do you call a clever monster?
Frank Einstein.
How did Dr. Frankenstein pay the men who built his monster?
On a piece rate.
Which musical group did Frankenstein not like at all?
The Village People.
What’s Frankenstein’s favorite food?
Frankenfurters.
Dr. Frankenstein: Igor, have you seen my latest invention? It’s a new pill consisting of 50 percent glue and 50 percent aspirin.
Igor: But what is it for?
Dr. Frankenstein: For monsters with splitting headaches.
What monster plays the most April Fool’s jokes?
Prankenstein!
Where does a thrifty Frankenstein get his limbs?
At the second-hand store.
What did Frankenstein say when he was struck by lightning?
Great! A jolt to the bolt!
People keep asking me why I’m working for Dr. Frankenstein.
I’m just trying to make a living.
What did Dr.Frankenstein say when his monster spat on him?
It’s saliva!
How does Frankenstein eat his dinner?
He bolts it down.
What happened when Frankenstein’s monster first met his girlfriend?
It was love at first fright.
Frankenstein entered a body-building competition…
And soon found he had seriously misunderstood the objective.
Was there a spark between Frankenstein and his bride?
Yes, he simply couldn’t resistor.
Sad to hear that Baron von Frankenstein has given up on his dream of being an actor.
He couldn’t get the parts.
Dr. Frankenstein just placed an order on Amazon.
It wasn't expensive, but I imagine the shipping cost him an arm and a leg.
What do you call it when Dr. Frankenstein makes tea?
A monstrositea.
We all know Albert Einstein was a genius…
But his brother Frank was a monster.
Why is Frankenstein’s monster so popular?
He’s a real people person.
Why did Dr. Frankenstein hire Igor as his assistant?
He had a hunch about him.
Why did Frankenstein turn to solar?
For the free charge.
Why is Frankenstein such good fun?
Because he soon has you in stitches.
What do you call the Frankenstein of the Gardening world?
An A-botan-ation.
People say Frankenstein’s monster had a temper…
But actually he was surprisingly level-headed.
How did Frankenstein know Jesus was coming for a visit?
He used his frankincense.
What was the inscription on the tomb of Frankenstein’s monster?
HERE LIES FRANKENSTEIN’S MONSTER. MAY HE REST IN PIECES.
Why didn’t Dr. Frankenstein ever make a second monster?
Because he just didn’t have the guts to do it again.
Why did Frankenstein’s monster give up boxing?
Because he didn’t want to spoil his looks.
How do you know Frankenstein is tired?
He’s dead on his feet.
What is Dr. Frankenstein’s favorite part of a company?
Human resources.
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
What kind of dog did Frankenstein want for Christmas?
A lab.
Did you know Doctor Frankenstein used to be a lonely, lonely man?
Then he learned how to make friends.
How does Frankenstein speak?
Frankly.
What did one of Frankenstein’s ears say to the other?
I didn’t know we lived on the same block.
Why did Frankenstein tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
He didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills!
What did Dr. Frankenstein say when Pinocchio’s nose grew?
IT’S A LIEEEEE!!
Why doesn’t Frankenstein go on airplanes?
He can’t get past the airport metal detector.
I love making new friends.
That’s why I studied under Dr. Frankenstein.
What happened when Dr. Frankenstein swallowed some uranium?
He got atomic ache.
How does Frankenstein jump-start his day?
With a shock of lighting.
Why is Frankenstein always asking for help?
He’s looking for someone to give him a hand.
Why was Frankenstein’s monster always being arrested?
He was so easy to charge.
What happened when the ice monster had a furious row with Frankenstein?
He gave him the cold shoulder!
Frankenstein’s monster was really worried one day.
“Pull yourself together”, said Frankenstein.
Dr. Frankenstein must have been pretty buff.
He was a bodybuilder, after all.