My favorite crime TV show has a duck as the main character.
He always quacks the case.
I finally managed to get rid of that nasty electrical charge I’ve been carrying. I’m ex-static!”
I finally managed to get rid of that nasty electrical charge I’ve been carrying. I’m ex-static!
Did you hear what the foolish gardener did?
The guy planted a light bulb and though he’d get a power plant.
I threw my toaster into the toilet the other day.
It was a shock to the cistern.
What do you get if you put kisses in a blender?
A Smoochie.
Why did the man eat the light bulb? He was hoping it would give him a bright idea.”
Always knock on the fridge before opening.
Just in case there is a salad dressing
In the darkness, is where a flashlight really shines!
I put some big, giant, large, massive, enormous, huge bread in the toaster.
I was making synonym toast.
My friend pointed at a chandelier and said: "isn't that the coolest chandelier ever?"
I replied: "I don't know if it's the coolest, but it's up there."
Last night me and the wife watched three DVDs back to back.
Luckily I was the one facing the TV
I just burned my Hawaiian pizza in the oven
I guess I should have put it on aloha setting
My new toaster oven is a huge improvement for making lunch.
I used to eat unappetizing sandwiches but I quit cold turkey.
What did the man say after he came out of the walk-in freezer?
"That experience was chilling."
I went to shop for a toaster. The sailsman showed me all the fancy features.
I said "wow, that's cool!"
And he replied, "Sorry ma'am,it can only warm"
I bought a secured warehouse where I keep appliances to clean pots, pans, plates, and silverware.
It's dishwasher safe!
Why did the monk meditate with a light bulb? He hoped it would help him to reach enlightenment.”
It’s crazy that Dubai doesn’t show The Flintstones on TV...
But Abu Dhabi Do!
As a refrigerator technician, after a hard day on the job, I like to relax...
And chill out.
I can’t afford to pay for electricity anymore; these are some dark times.
Why is wind power popular? Because it has a lot of fans!”
My landlord said we need to talk about how high my heating bill is.
I replied: “Sure, my door is always open.”
A hand mixer started a speakeasy.
It was a wisk-y business.
I was pretty mad when the air conditioner stopped working...
I lost my cool.
Why did the electrical cords break up?
There was no spark between them.
What is an energy provider’s favorite dance?
The electric slide.
How does a dog stop a TV show?
He presses paws!
A cow not being on the grill for very long is a rare occurrence.
I really have to force myself to get through this book on friction.
What do you call a gorilla stuck in a ventilation shaft?
A Duct-ape.
I caught my friend harassing some electricity. I told him it was an abuse of power.”
I hit my head on a light bulb today, but it’s okay.
It was a soft white.
Did you hear about the guy who fell into the industrial cake mixer?
He's feeling much batter now.
My dad argued with a stove
The conversation really started to heat up
What do you call a catholic toaster strudel?
A pope tart.
What is a jedi electrician’s favorite tool?
His lightsaber.
What is a plug’s favorite chant at a sporting event?
CHARGE!!
Why did the freezer never graduate?
Because it was set on 0 degrees.
Did you hear about the abusive flashlight? It was charged with battery.
What sound does a vacuum sweeper make when it explodes?
Ka-BROOM!!!
A wind turbine saw a solar panel at an energy convention. He leaned in and shouted, Hey, I’m a big fan!”
What did the lamp eat?
A light snack...
My wife left a note on the fridge, saying, "This isn't working. Goodbye."
I opened it and it works fine.
My son asked me how I never seemed to lose the TV remote when he was growing up.
I told him I'd always put it in a location away from all the clutter...
A remote location.
Why did the monk meditate with a light bulb?
He hoped it would help him to reach enlightenment.
When you clean out a vacuum cleaner, you make the vacuum cleaner.
Why are environmentalists attracted to electricity?
It’s natural.
I just built a car out of a washing machine.
I’ll be taking it for a spin later.
My son asked me if I ate the leftovers he was saving in the refrigerator.
I told him "of course not - I ate them in the living room"