Why did the electricity documentary get such mixed reviews?
People weren’t sure how to feel after it’s shocking ending.
What do you call a gorilla stuck in a ventilation shaft?
A Duct-ape.
Why was the broken air conditioner already sad?
Because it couldn’t vent it’s problems.
My heater won't stop running.
I swear it has no chill.
What did the blender say to his crush?
"I have mixed feelings about you, but we might blend together perfectly."
I just built a car out of a washing machine.
I’ll be taking it for a spin later.
An electrician needed to change 8 fluorescent lamps to brighten up a large conference room at our office. I asked him if he needed a hand carrying them.
He said no, this is light.
What penalty in hockey uses the most amount of energy? A power play.”
Why did the man eat the light bulb? He was hoping it would give him a bright idea.”
What did the dough say after half an hour in the oven?
I’m bready.
I put my fancy shirts in the freezer before I wear them.
It's cold fashion, look it up!
What did the light bulb say to the generator? ‘I really get a charge out of you!”
If you plant a light bulb in your garden, does it grow into a power plant?
Two TV antennas meet on a roof, fall in love and get married...
The ceremony was boring but the reception was brilliant.
Invest in grills!
They're hot steakholders!
How did the electrician pay for his new phone?
He charged it.
How many museum curators does it take to change a light bulb?
6. 1 changes it and the other 5 preserve, display, and celebrate the old model.
Today, I changed a light bulb, crossed a street, and walked into a bar.
My life is a joke.
I heard my son complaining about doing laundry.
He said, 'These just socks'.
I once knew a priest that only ate microwave soup.
He was a Ramen Catholic.
A wind turbine saw a solar panel at an energy convention. He leaned in and shouted, Hey, I’m a big fan!”
We ran out of laundry detergent today and had to open up a new one.
It was a changing of the Tide.
I love lamps.
They're so enlightening.
My mum asked me to watch the stove while she went to the bathroom. She was so angry when she got back...
Things really boiled over
More places are charging fees to iron my clothes after they launder them...
I guess the free press is under siege!
Just burned 2,000 calories.
That’s the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.
Why are refrigerator shelves hipsters?
They were there before it was cool.
My fridge stopped working...
Its not cool.
What do you call a turtle in a chef’s hat?
A slow cooker.
What did the toaster say to the criminal bread?
"I'm taking you into crustody"
If you think that your phone, laptop, microwave and fridge spying on you is bad
Then you should know that your vaccum cleaner has been collecting dirt on you for a while .
What do you call a regular potato broadcasting sports?
A common tater.
How many software engineers do you need to change a light bulb?
None – it’s a hardware problem.
What is an electrician’s favorite flavor of ice cream? Shock-a-lot.”
I tried to taste the hot light bulb
But I got my tungstenned.
I can't find my humidifier anymore...
I have reported it misting.
Just bought a vacuum cleaner, from a Buddhist selling them door to door. I should have known better..
It came with no attachments.
I love taking pictures of myself next to boiling kettles.
My friend reckons I have selfie steam issues
The guy who got arrested for eating batteries…. He is to be charged in the morning.
What's the first tea that comes in a teapot?
empytea
I hit my head on a light bulb today, but it’s okay.
It was a soft white.
Why did the electrical cords break up? There was no spark between them.”
I think my window air conditioner needs an ambulance.
It keeps hyperventilating.
A sweater I bought was picking up static electricity. So, I returned it to the store. They gave me another one free of charge.”
What was the light bulb’s occupation?
He was a conductor
Refrigerators look kinda boring.
But actually they're pretty cool
So earlier I took my clothes from the washer and threw them into the dryer.
I can't be sure how they felt about that, but they seemed agitated.
Asked my boy to boil the kettle.
He said, "wouldn't it be better to boil some water?"
I stopped ironing my clothes.
I have less pressing concerns.
When you clean out a vacuum cleaner, does that make YOU a vacuum cleaner?