How did the horse solve a murder?
Compiled newspaper clippings.
What is the coldest type of horse?
A freezian.
Beat funny horse puns
What’s a horse’s favorite makeup brand?
Neighhhbelline.
Why did the horse like her new backpack?
The straps were adju-stable.
What was the horse’s best ballroom dance? The Foxtrot.
How do ponies react when the opposing team comes on the field?
They horse-boo.
Where do horses go on vacation?
Flankfurt.
Why is Pegasus so smart?
He’s all kno-wing.
How did the horse know the others were gossiping about him?
He herd.
What do you call a horse running on a table?
A counter canter.
Why didn’t the horse buy a house?
The costs were mounting.
Who did the horse ask to be his second wife?
A manewer model.
Why was Pegasus such a good ballerina?
He was flo-wing.
Why was the horse a great editor?
She was very thorough bred.
What do racehorses eat?
Fast food.
What does a Clydesdale say when you offer them a carrot?
“Of course, my horse.”
Why does a horse’s hair always look so good?
She mane-tains it.
Why would a horse make a good president?
They know how to lead.
How does a horse make paper mâché?
With newspaper clip-clop-pings.
What’s does a winged horse like to munch on?
Pe-grass-us.
Where do horses get their mane cut?
The hair-dressager.
What does a horse call its treats?
My greatest preakness.
Where do the cool horses live?
In rad-docks.
How do horses get to another star system? They travel through intergalloptic space.
How does a rude princess sit on a horse?
Snide-saddle.
Why did the horse climb Everest?
She liked mount-ains.
How did the ponies stay in touch?
C-horse-pondence.
What did the horse say when it saw a sheepdog?
“Why is your furlong?”
Why couldn’t the little girl ride the horse?
It was feeling bucky.
How do baby horses get tucked in at night?
They get told a tail.
Where do most horses work for their first job?
Re-tail stores.
How could you tell the horse gained weight?
It had extra girth.
What does a winged horse drink from at a party?
A keg-asus.
Why couldn’t the equestrian find the carrots? They were down by the bay.
What kind of car do fancy horses drive?
Mustangs.
What do you call a rainbow you ride your horse on?
A rein-bow.
How do horses greet each other?
“Hayyyyy.”
What cartoon do horses like to watch?
Whinny the Pooh.
What do winged horses attend in school? Pegclasses.
Why did they stop giving the horse grass?
They wanted it to be less green.
Where do horses go to the bathroom?
The bathroom stall-ion.
How does a horse tow its trailer?
With a Ford Bronco.
What’s happens to the sportiest horse?
It gets to be first horse-pick of the draft.
How do horses show gratitude?
Flank you very much.
What did the ponies do when it was raining? Stay ind-horse.
How does a Pegasus ask her boyfriend to propose?
She says “You’ve got to put a wing on it.”
Why couldn’t the baby horse eat dessert?
It was foal.
How could you tell the horse was getting old?
It was wither-ing away.
What's a horse's favorite sport?
Stable tennis.
Why did the horse go to jail?
The prosecutors failed to show the burden of hoof.
What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse's mouth?
A mechanic.
What kind of bread does a racehorse eat?
Thoroughbred.