A crow invited his buddies over to hang out but they didn’t show up.
He was charged with attempted murder.
What do crows drink in order to stay awake? They drink cawfee.
What is the favorite bread of a crow? Crow-issant.
The baby crow decided to dress up as his favorite vegetable on Halloween, he dressed up as a caw-liflower.
My pet raven, Poe, started coughing... thought it was Corvid-19, but then the bird flu away. Think I will see him nevermore.
Crowing, crowing, gone.
What kind of bird always gets stuck in the nest? A velcrow.
And the collective nouns go: a murder of crows, a herd of cows, a migraine of children.
Experts suggest that the crows flying beak first into windows at a horrifying speed comit a murder suicide.
Have you ever heard of the Crows Law Of Energy Conservation?
It's also known as the Law of Caws and Effect.
A group of crows is usually called a 'murder.' Technically, it's only a manslaughter unless there is probable caws.
Crows go, listen, perform, and enjoy live music, at cawnsorts.
I hate getting into arguments with farmers about the best methods for keeping crows away.
They always resort to straw man arguments.
What do crows take for their gut issues? crow-biotics.
What are unsolved murders called when it happens in a society of crows? Murder mysteries.
On Halloween night a group of crows decided to enact a scene from the play Julius Ceaser, they were enacting the caw-nspiracy scene.
A bear covered in a bunch of crows gives the picture of a grizzly murder.
Don't give up at this stage, just keep cawing on, you will do great.
I stole seven crows yesterday.
Got away with murder.
What do you call a noisy group of crows?
A caw-cophony!
One of my friends who hates crows, looked at a flock of crows, I saw murder in his eyes.
Crows hold grudges. They're also fond of eating the dead. Now...
they've been found to copulate with corpses.
NeCROWphilia.
What kind of ice cream do pigs like best?
Hoggin Daz!
Ravens fans are so tough....they hang out in crowbars.
What is a crows favorite vegetable?
Corn on the caawb.
What did the pig do when it came to a pork in the road? It pigged the road less traveled.
It is said that crows and owls are in caw-hoots.
My Chinese neighbour said he's just opened a crows shop.
Speaking slowly, I said "you mean a *clothes* shop?"
He says, "No, a crows shop - come in and have a rook."
Where do crows go to get educated?
CAWlege
The group of crows that attacked the lady was accused of murder, the cawps are still looking for the probable caws.
Why are crows so interesting?
Just beCAWse
I used to own a raven. It could speak English, but the only word it could speak was "car".
What did the irritated crow said to his fried?
I won't talk to you if you don’t stop ravening.
What do you call a group of dyslexic crows?
A redrum.
I said some stubtly racist stuff to a magpie
She was a victim of my crow aggressions.
I had to carry a group of crows once.
It was murder on my back!
Crows love Cawnie Chung, their favorite reporter.
There was a recent study showing that crows were hit a lot more by trucks than cars...
they came to the conclusion that this was because crows can warn each other by going "CAAAR CAAAR" but can't say "TRUCK TRUCK".
When buying crows for commercial use, always buy them in groups...
That way, you’re guaranteed to make a killing.
My friend uses a white crow to protect his farm from other crows
He calls it a rarecrow
What do you call two crows flying together?
An attempted murder
Why was the crow so angry after his stand up comedy gig? The venue paid him in coffee instead of caw fee.
I saved a tiny baby crow and now he won't leave, I guess you could say he's mi-cro.
Who was the criminal crow running from? The cawps.
What’s the difference between a crow and a chicken?
A chicken can crow, but a crow can’t chicken.
After graduating from high school, crows go to caw-lleges for further studies.
A bunch of crows ganged up and killed a chicken.
It was a murder most fowl.
What do you call it when a raven marries a crow? A conspiracy to commit to murder.
How does an antisocial crow say about a family party? "It was murder".
Why was the crow on the telephone wire? To make a long-distance caw.