I donโt care if all of the other giants see me as a big joke for filing a restraining order on a guy Iโve got 75 feet on. Beanstalked is a serious matter.
When my grandparents came over they said: โYou look like youโve grown a foot!โ I looked down to my feet, looked back up, and told them: โNo, I still have just two.โ
A blonde was taking helicopter lessons.
The instructor said, "I'll radio you every 1000 feet to see how you're doing."
At 1000 feet, the instructor radioed her and said she was doing great.
At 2000 feet, he said she was still doing well.
Right before she got to 3000 feet, the propeller stopped, and she twirled to the ground.
The instructor ran to where she crash landed and pulled her out of the helicopter. "What went wrong?"
The blonde said, "At 2500 feet, I started to get cold, so I turned the big fan off."
A grandfather takes his grandchildren to the beach.
Theyโre playing in the sand when suddenly, a massive wave comes and pulls the smallest grandson out into the water.
Panicked, the grandfather prays to God. โOh God, please bring him back! Please let him live, in your mercy. I'll do anything and worship you forever!โ
Almost immediately, an even bigger wave bursts out of the ocean, setting the little boy down right at his grandfatherโs feet.
He scoops him up in a huge hug, crying with relief. Then he stares up at the sky and says, โHe had a hat.โ
The ham's on your pillow, The egg's in your sheet, The bran muffin's rollin' Down under your feet, There's milk in the mattress, And juice on the spread - Well, you said that you wanted Your breakfast in bed.
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