Why didn’t the flamingo cross the road?
Because he’s not a chicken.
Why did the toddler cross the road?
He wanted to pet the chicken.
Why did the fish cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
Why did the turkey cross the road?
To prove he wasn’t chicken!
Why did the corn cross the road?
Because it was being stalked.
Why did the czar cross the road?
To get to his car.
Why did the zebra cross the road?
Because it was a zebra crossing.
Why did the dog cross the road twice?
He was playing Fetch with a boomerang.
A Duck is about to cross the road. A chicken runs out to stop him screaming "Don't do it, man - you'll never hear the end of it!"
Why couldn't the mathematician cross the road?
Because he kept trying to half the distance.
Why did the man with one hand cross the road?
To get to the second-hand shop.
Why did Hans cross the road alone?
Hans wanted to travel solo.
Why did the farmer cross the road?
To get his chicken back.
Why did the horse cross the road?
To get to the apple store.
Why did the dragon cross the road?
He was dragged on by his mum.
Why did the Communist wait till the last minute to cross the road?
He was Stalin.
Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn’t have the guts.
Why did the turtle cross the road?
To get to the Shell station.
Why did the dog cross the road?
To get out of the barking lot.
Why did the lion cross the road?
He was bored of lion around.
Why did the goldfish cross the road?
Because the chicken was on holiday.
Why did the reindeer cross the road?
Because he was tied to a chicken!
Why did Adele cross the road?
To say hello from the other side!
Why did my wife cross the road?
To go back to the same shoe shop we went to three hours ago.
How long did it take Lancelot to cross the road?
All knight.
Why did the rabbit cross the road?
It had to get from hare to there.
Why did the doctor cross the road?
Hard to say really. Could be any number of reasons.
Which bug always crosses the road?
A beetle.
What did the buffalo say when his son crossed the road?
-Bison.
Why did the elephant cross the road?
The chicken couldn’t be bothered anymore.
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the udder side.
Why did the rooster cross the road?
He had something to cock-a-doodle dooo!
Why did the raccoon cross the road?
He saw you put out the garbage.
Why did the engineer cross the road?
Because he looked in the files, and that’s what they did last time.
Why did the snail take so long to cross the road?
It was feeling sluggish.
Why did the bunny cross the road?
To go to the hare dresser.
Why did the potato run across the road?
So it wouldn’t get mashed.
Why did the wolf take so long to cross the road?
It was pretending to be a snail.
Why did the monster truck drive on the sidewalk?
Because he didn’t want to run over the chicken!