Why did the dragon cross the road?
He was dragged on by his mum.
Why did the queen cross the road?
To get to coronation street.
Why did the cow cross the road?
So he could go to the MOO-vies.
Why did the monkey cross the road?
Because the chicken retired.
Why did the raccoon cross the road?
He saw you put out the garbage.
Why did the coyote cross the road?
It was chasing the road runner.
Why did the duck cross the road?
Because it thought it was a chicken.
Why did the elephant cross the road?
The chicken couldn’t be bothered anymore.
Why did the czar cross the road?
To get to his car.
Why did the turkey cross the road?
It was Thanksgiving Day, and it wanted people to think it was a chicken!
Why did the dog cross the road?
Because he was chasing the chicken.
Why did the farmer cross the road?
To get his chicken back.
Why did the engineer cross the road?
Because he looked in the files, and that’s what they did last time.
Why did the nose cross the road?
Because he was tired of getting picked on.
Why did the fish cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
How did the sheep cross the road?
It ram across.
Why did the horse dance while crossing the road?
He was horsing around.
Why does the tin keep crossing the road?
Because it can.
Why did the toddler cross the road?
He wanted to pet the chicken.
Why did the sheep cross the road?
To get to the baa-baa shop for a haircut.
Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn’t have the guts.
Why did Hans cross the road alone?
Hans wanted to travel solo.
Why did the gum cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken’s foot.
Why didn’t the bicycle cross the road?
Because it was two tired!
Why did the potato run across the road?
So it wouldn’t get mashed.
Why did Chuck Norris cross the road?
He didn’t — the road moved back underneath him.
Why did the alphabet cross the road?
To get from Point A to Point B.
Why did the snail take so long to cross the road?
It was feeling sluggish.
Why did the turkey cross the road?
To prove he wasn’t chicken!
Why did the man with one hand cross the road?
To get to the second-hand shop.
Why did the rooster cross the road?
He had something to cock-a-doodle dooo!
How many birds can cross the road?
Toucan.
Why did the spy cross the road?
Because he was never on your side.
Why did the corn cross the road?
Because it was being stalked.
Why didn’t the flamingo cross the road?
Because he’s not a chicken.
How do animals know when to cross the road?
The chameleon changes from red to green.
What kind of cat always crosses the road?
A jaguar.
Why did my wife cross the road?
To go back to the same shoe shop we went to three hours ago.
What did the buffalo say when his son crossed the road?
-Bison.
Why did Adele cross the road?
To say hello from the other side!
Why did the goldfish cross the road?
Because the chicken was on holiday.
Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
Because chickens didn’t exist yet.
How did the sushi cross the road?
It was rolling.
Why did the zebra cross the road?
Because it was a zebra crossing.
Why did the turtle cross the road?
To get to the Shell station.
Why did the clown cross the road?
To retrieve his rubber chicken.
Why did the dog cross the road twice?
He was playing Fetch with a boomerang.
Why did the horse cross the road?
To get to the apple store.
Which bug always crosses the road?
A beetle.
A Duck is about to cross the road. A chicken runs out to stop him screaming "Don't do it, man - you'll never hear the end of it!"
