My friend Elmer’s has gotten really good at tennis ever since he stuck to a healthier diet and went glue-ten free.
Tennis is a lot like waiting tables. The most important thing to get right is the first serve.
Ana hits a lot of floating shots that her opponents destroy for winners. We need to sitter down and have a talk.
Mary didn’t miss a first serve the entire match. It was not her fault she lost.
I am disappointed that you are taking such a closed-stance on my footwork advice.
Fred is so condescending about my tennis strokes. I can’t take any more of his backhanded compliments.
I can’t believe I framed the ball in for a winner. Shank you!
Djokovic to his friends the morning after winning the U.S. Open: Is anyone hungry for some Denny’s? Because I would like another Grand Slam.
The guy missed both his serves on match point. I won by de-fault.
I’m a baseliner and I don’t know how to volley: my game would disappear if I went to no-man’s land.
You can never get short balls over the net! Solution: Drop shot from arsenal.
The classiest indoor tennis facilities serve bubble tea.
Is your eyesight as bad as your cell phone reception? Because that was a terrible call.
The density of this concrete leads me to believe one thing: it is a hard court.
I wish they’d change the scoring system, but tennis is set in its ways and doesn’t see the point.
I prefer the new system to reviewing line calls. When Hawk-eye came around, I breathed a big Cy-clops of relief.
I want to play my match outdoors so I can hit the ball higher in the air. I’m not good at persuading people, so I’m going to hire a lob-byist.
Two racquets started dating. Unfortunately, one was stringing the other along without any intention of tying the knot.
A hippie when his opponent disputes his calls: That’s pretty far-out, man!
I got so mad at my partner hitting moonballs, I had to pusher off the court.
The injured player wanted to congratulate the winner, but he couldn’t walkover to the other side of the court.
An orange and an apple signed up for a tournament. No one was surprised to find out they were both seeded.
