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Henry Jokes

Trumpet Puns
One of my ancestors was once hired by Henry VIII to teach his son to play the trumpet
He was a Tudor tooter tutor.
Medieval Puns
Why did Henry VIII struggle to breathe?
He had no heir!
Funny Work Quotes
“A diamond is merely a lump of coal that did well under pressure.” — Henry Kissenger
“It takes less time to do a thing right, than it does to explain why you did it wrong.” — Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
History Puns
Henry VIII had breathing troubles - he had no heir!
Food Quotes
"Americans will eat garbage provided you sprinkle it liberally with ketchup."
— Henry James
Garden Quotes
"Bulb: potential flower buried in Autumn, never to be seen again."
- Henry Beard
Dinosaur Puns
What was the first car Henry Fordasaurus invented? A Model T-Rex.
Coffee Puns
How did Henry VIII like his coffee? Decap.
Viking Puns
Was Henry VI a ViKing?
Funny Money Quotes
“What’s the use of happiness? It can’t buy you money.”- Henry Youngman
Funny Marriage Quotes
“We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.” - Henry Youngman
“My wife dresses to kill, she cooks the same way.” - Henry Youngman
Chocolate Puns
Why did they put Viagra in chocolate bars? You eat it, She says, "Oh, Oh Henry!"