Coming Jokes

Want to see the real coming attraction?
An idea is one of the worst killers of vampires. They don't see it coming, and then it dawns on them.
“I’m like Pacman when I’m at a party, I eat everything and run away from anyone coming close to me.”
― Unknown
My son ate daffodil bulbs instead of onions
But that's really serious! Is he in hospital?

Yes, he's still a bit yellow, but he should be coming out in the spring.
Two frogs fell into a bucket of cream
And must paddle to keep afloat;
But one soon tired and sank to rest
With a gurgling sigh in his throat.
The other paddled away all night,
And not a croak did he utter,
And with the coming of morning light
He rode on an island of butter.
The flies came thick to his island home
And made him a breakfast snappy.
The milkmaid shrieked and upset the pail,
And froggy hopped away happy.
We can all find a moral in this rhyme,
And should hasten at once to apply:
Success will come in the most difficult time
If we paddle and never say die!
"What does the letter "A" have in common with a flower?
They both have bees coming after them."
- Kim Roblin
Hear that sound? (cup hand to ear) Yep- that's a dump truck, and it's coming for you!
What do you call a group of butchers coming together? A meating.
Why did people stop going to the ghoul hospital?
They kept coming out dead!
What did the crow said when it saw a car coming? Cawr.
How did Frankenstein know Jesus was coming for a visit?
He used his frankincense.
I told my friend that our old school friend is coming to attend St Patrick's feast. She was surprised. She asked, "O'Reilly?"
Don’t worry, Moher pictures are coming.
I’m like a boomerang. I just keep coming back to you.
That mask is becoming on you. If it were me, I’d be coming too.