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America Jokes

Pick Up Lines
On a scale of 1 to America, how free are you tomorrow night?
Funny Work Quotes
“Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I’m not there, I go to work.” – Robert Orben
History Puns
Why did the Pilgrims sail to America?
It was too far to swim.
What do the early European settlers in America have in common with ants?
They both lived in colonies!
Why were Native Americans in America first?
They had reservations.
Before America was founded, the idea of a democratic nation in the New World was unPresidented.
4th of July Pick Up Lines
Yo girl are you the 29th state added to America?
Because Iowanna be with anybody else
You might not be America, but I found a whole new world with you.
On a scale of one to America, how free are you tonight?
Travel Puns
I'd want to know why the winters are so cold in America. I think Alaska local.
Funny Groucho Marx Quotes
"I read in the newspapers they are going to have 30 minutes of intellectual stuff on television every Monday from 7:30 to 8. to educate America. They couldn't educate America if they started at 6:30."
Spain Puns
Which bus went from Spain to America?
Columbus.
Family Puns
What did the father ant said to his son when they moved to france from america?
"Son, we are now Europeants!"
Funny Money Quotes
“Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I’m not there, I go to work.” – Robert Orben
Viking Puns
When the Vikings discovered America, what did they name it?
Norse America.
Jose the Tourist
A young Mexican man named Jose was curious about America so he saved his money and went on a trip. He wanted to go see a baseball game so when he went home, he could tell his family all about it. When he got there, the game was sold out, so he decided to climb to the top of a flag pole to get a better look. When he returned home, his family was anxious to hear about his experience: "What happened?" asked his family. "Well, America is the nicest place in the world!!" he said. "Before the game started, all the people in the stands and all the players stood up, looked at me and shouted to me: "Jose, can you see?"