The loveliest subject in schools History because it has so many dates.
What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?
One molar solution.
Refrigerators look kinda boring.
But actually they're pretty cool
In the dark ages, the knights had to attend a special type of school. It was the Knight School.
What did the light bulb say to the electric generator? ‘You spark up my life!”
What do you call a knight who is afraid to fight?
Sir Render
What do you call 3 knights in a relationship?
Polyarmory
What does vikings call english villages?
Chopping centers.
What did the vacuum cleaner salesman say before murdering his son?
Dyson!
Q: What was the most important holiday in ancient Egypt?
A: Mummy's Day.
What do you call a glass robot that is good at physics?
A new-clear physicist.
I can't remember how to write 1, 1000, 51, 6 or 500 in Roman numerals.
I M L I VI D
Why were Native Americans in America first?
They had reservations.
Why does nobody talk to circles?
Because there is no point!
Which cheese surrounds a medieval castle?
Moatzarella.
Where does King Arthur throw his stupid knights?
In the Dumbgeon.
A friend of mine once found a hundred dollar bill in his pocket after doing laundry...
I became too afraid he might have gotten himself into the money laundering business.
What did the lamp eat?
A light snack...
What did the gladiator say when he was surrounded by nearly 100 men?
IC
What is the name of that knight who is very fond of the sea and spends most of his time at sea beaches? We call him Sir Fer.
I spilled some acid on my aluminum fork and it dissolved…
but I didn’t mean to! It was an oxidant.
How was the viking party?
Pretty Loki.
I just finished my masters in engineering with a concentration in adhesives...
Within the next year I want to publish my first book on tape.
The Covid-19 vaccine should be tested on politicians first...
If they survive, the vaccine is safe.
If they don't, the country is safe.
Why are 40 romans funny?
Because they are XD.
What do power strips always say at their high school reunions? I haven’t seen you in light-years.”
Why did the monk meditate with a light bulb? He hoped it would help him to reach enlightenment.”
What do you call a Viking who's been bitten by a vampire?
Norseferatu.
What is the name of the device that the king uses to control the moat around his castle? A remoat control.
What do Vikings call the people that cut their hair?
Barberians.
Is your refrigerator running? I was hoping to vote for it.
Why did Alexander not like eating chicken legs? Because he hated defeat.
You know what it's called when you hurry to develop a vaccine?
... Russian.
I think my window air conditioner needs an ambulance.
It keeps hyperventilating.
I was going to become a biologist. But all the endless coursework on hearts and lungs and kidneys and so on just made it seem like one long organ recital.
Roman soldiers are trained.
But Vikings are Bjorn.
What do math and history have in common?
They both teach people about inequalities.
What is a Viking's favorite music?
Ragnarock.
Vincent Van Gogh met a knight during the latter part of his life, who inspired him to draw one of his most famous paintings - The Starry Knight.
Bacteria is the only culture some people have.
Why do Pharaohs never tell dad jokes? Because they are all mummies.
How does the mother call the pharaoh son to the table?
Tutan, come on.
Why did the monk meditate with a light bulb?
He hoped it would help him to reach enlightenment.
Q: Why are ghosts scared of mummies?
A: They tear up the ghost's sheets
What do you call a candle in armor?
A knight light
Who said that the pyramids are the tallest structure in Egypt? They are just between pyra-highs and pyra-lows.
A Viking walked into a bar.
The bartender asked, Why the long ship?
Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
What do mushrooms watch on TV?
Spores.
What did one mole say to the other?
We have great chemistry together.