The viking Rudolph the Red looked outside and proclaimed it was going to rain.
His wife asked him, “What makes you say that?”
He replied, “Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear.”
Thunderstorms are shrewd investors. They put their money in a combination of frozen and liquid assets.
What do you call a dinosaur that got stuck in the rain?
A driplodocus.
Nowadays, people drought the accuracy of weather men because the climatic patterns are so unpredictable.
What’s the difference between a horse and wet weather?
One reigns up and the other rains down.
I'm saving for a rainy day, so far I've collected a couple of raincoats, an anorak, and a dinghy.
It started raining coins outside today.
I guess it’s just climate change.
What should you do if it starts raining cats and dogs?
Please seek shelters.
When can 3 elephants stand under 1 umbrella and not get wet?
When it’s not raining.
A man once said when is Monday coming? His wife said Mon-soon.
When we were young, we had this myth that lightning bolts go all the way to cloud 9.
Why are people in big cities in Spain always dry?
Because the rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain.
What always goes up whenever the rain comes down? An umbrella.
What do you call a month’s worth of rain?
England.
Why do sailors eat shellfish when rain is forecast?
It’s the clam before the storm.
Yesterday’s weather forecast predicted freezing rain. However, it turned out to be quite an ice day.
What do you call a baby owl stuck in the rain?
A moist owlette.
Ensure you save for the rainy day because even your closest friends can give you a cold shoulder.
Two fish were swimming in a stream when it began to rain.
One fish said, “Quick, let’s swim under that bridge, otherwise we will get wet!”
What did one raindrop say to the other raindrop?
“My plop is bigger than your plop.”
What does a ghost wear when it’s raining outside?
Boooooooooooots.
I hope it doesn’t rain Halloween night.
That would dampen spirits.
What did the rainwater say as it ran off the road.
Grate.
What do you call a camper driving through frozen rain?
Van Hailin’.
Rain doesn’t fall. Raindrops.
Why is rain the best kind of music?
Because it has amazing drops.
When the storm begun, the garden party became a bit disorganized and food service was turned to a frost come frost served.
What do you get if you come fourth in the National Weatherman Awards? A precipitation trophy.
Sorry for raining on your parade, I really thought it'd be snow problem.
Why don’t Native Americans like to do rain dances in April anymore?
Because April showers bring Mayflowers.
When is it raining money? Whenever there's 'change' in the weather.
There are so many puppies and kitties around the neighbourhood. Perhaps it is because it has been raining cats and dogs for hours.
What was one raindrop overheard saying to another? Two's company, three's a cloud.
What did the evaporating raindrop say?
I’m going to pieces.
How could the skeleton tell that rain was coming?
He could feel it in his bones.
What do books wear on a wet and rainy day? Rain quotes.
The weather man said there won’t be any rain for 6 months, but I drought it.
A man went to the gym today and met up with his new personal rainer.
What goes hiss, swish, hiss swish every time it rains? A windscreen viper.
What does Santa often say to Mrs Claus? Come and look at the rain-dear.
What did the ghost knights say to the cloud king?
Our souls will rain forever.
How does one raindrop ask another out? Water you doing tonight?
What happens before it rains candy? It sprinkles.
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Accordion
Accordion who?
Accordion to the forecast, it's going to rain tonight.
What's all wet and likes to shake? It's an earthquake on a rainy day.
When it was raining yesterday, I saw a man use ketchup and I got quite shocked. It is only later that I learnt he was taking advantage of the raining cats and hot dogs.
With the kind of weather, it was almost certain that the bride-to-be would get a hoarse throat as she walked through the rain into her bridal shower.
Why did the dad prefer driving in the rain?
Things ran more fluidly.
What is known as the world's wettest animal? Rain-deer.
Does all this rain make you want an ark?
I Noah guy.