Did you hear the Islamic music group who covered "I've Got You Babe?"
Sunni and Shia.
What do you call a boy and girl playing blues music? The battle of the saxes.
Why did the pianist quit playing the piano?
Bad Bach.
I've removed all the black keys from my piano
Hopefully I'll C Major improvement!
Hear about the saxophone player who switched from a tenor to a soprano saxophone in the middle of the concert?
The press made quite a big deal out of his sax change.
How do you trap a drum kit?
Use a snare
C, E-flat, and G walk into a bar.
The bartender says: "Hold it! We don't serve minors here."
My friend told me all about his friend's girlfriend who was playing saxophone.
Apparently she was a saxy lady.
What do you call a pianist who throws trash everywhere?
Litterachi.
What is a garbage disposal’s favorite music group?
NSYNC.
Why can't redheads be in blues or jazz bands?
They got no soul.
What did the drummer name his twin daughters?
Anna one, Anna two...
What was Beethoven’s favourite fruit?
BA-NA-NA-NAAAAAA... BA-NA-NA-NAAAAAA...
I asked my musician friend if he plays by ear.
He said, "Yes, it's a violin. That is how you hold it."
You ever heard the Stormtrooper band?
Probably not, they've never had a hit.
What's the difference between a guitar and a fish?
You can tune a guitar but you can't "tuna" fish!
Why did the jazz musician refuse to be quarantined?
Cause he was an outdoor cat.
I've been diagnosed with a type of amnesia that makes me deny the existence of certain 80's bands.
There is no cure.
What do you call it when there are two nuns in a drum circle?
a conundrum
If you suck playing the trumpet, that's probably why.
All my neighbours bought the same set of stereos...
When will they stop stereotyping?
A woman is on trial for beating her significant other with a guitar. “First offender?” the judge asked.
“No” she replied. “First a Gibson , then a Fender”.
How do you keep your violin from being stolen?
Put it in a viola case.
The ad said "Free Violin", but there were strings attached...
There are so many jokes about classical composers I could write you a Liszt.
What is the difference between a trumpet soloist and King Kong? King Kong is more sensitive.
What do you get if you drop a piano on an army base?
A flat major.
Which element is a member of famous rock band?
Hg
Did you hear about the conductor who was arrested for inciting violins?
They strung him up, but he didn't fret.
Did you hear about the new Smashing Pumpkins cover band?
They call themselves Squished Squash!
My neighbors are listening to great music.
Whether they like it or not.
I hooked a stereo up to my recliner.
Now it's a rocking chair.
My orchestra buddy wanted to bring his fiddle to a protest. I told him not to.
In a peaceful protest, there's no need for violins.
Egyptians claimed to have invented the guitar,
But they were such lyres.
I've recently started up a band called "Mum's The Word."
If anyone asks, you've not seen us.
What does a trumpet and a lawsuit have in common? Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.
I really like guitars
They just strike a chord with me.
I tried to play a bass guitar once.
It didn't make much sound, and it slipped out of my hands and swam away.
I recently met a musical group of pirates.
They called themselves A-Band-On-Ship.
What is a pianist’s favorite cheese ?
Mozzartrella.
Why was the piano laughing?
Because I was tickling his ivories
What do you call it when you spill your drink all over a piano?
Rag time.
I wrote a song about a tortilla. Well actually, it’s more of a wrap.
Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?
He was playing by ear.
What concert costs 45 cents?
50 Cent featuring Nickelback.
Newscaster Dad: And now, here is John with the weather.
Weatherman: It’s Jim, actually.
Newscaster: My apologies. Here’s John with the Jim.
A sheep, a drum and a snake fall down a cliff,
Ba-dum-tss
How many conductors does it take to change a lightbulb?
Nobody knows because no-one ever watches the conductor.
Our church band is just two ladies on percussion...
It’s quite the CoNunDrum
You know those silly hacker movies where they're hacking so hard they type on two keyboards at once?
Such blatant stereo-typing