What is a cat lover's favourite tree?
A juni-purr.
How did the telephone propose to his girl?
Duh, ain’t it obvious? He gave her a ring!
I love you from my head tomatoes.
I always have a souper time with you.
Never laugh at your spouse’s choice… You’re one of them.
Or maybe it’s baseball players because they’re so great at hitting it off.
You met all of my koala-fications
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Olive.
Olive, who?
Olive you, and I don’t care who knows it!
I love you with all my butt.
I would say my heart, but it is just not as big. (wink wink where my curvy booties at?!)
My wife and were on the sofa and I lean in for a cuddle.
She says: "careful I'm holding a tea!"
And I say: "and I'm holding you, so I guess we're both holding letters of the alphabet"
Some bunny loves you.
If you get married out on sea or in a boat...
is that a row-mance?
I always find artists romantic because when they love you, they do it with all their art.
Wow, wouldn’t mind if you became my significant otter.
Your love is like vodka.
You were worth the chase.
You octopi my thoughts.
What do you call a person who illegally delivers hugs from country to country?
An international snuggler
What sound do hedgehogs make when they kiss?
Ouch
While cuddling my girlfriend, I whispered "Honey, this isn't working out for me."
Then I rolled off the bed and started doing push-ups. "This is working out for me!"
What did the patient with the broken leg say to their doctor?
Hey doc, I have a crutch on you.
What did the koala say to his girlfriend?
I love you-calpytus.
Did you hear Harry’s girlfriend left him for Keith?
Yeah, she was always telling the poor guy to Harry up, turns out she found someone who could Keith better.
I love you and I ain’t lion.
I used to love puns about throwing things, but now I don’t.
It was just a fling.
Owl always love you.
I’m no geometric genius, but all love triangles soon turn into wreck-tangles.
Its ok to kiss a nun....
But don't get into the habit.
You’re turtle-ly awesome.
My son fell asleep last night with the TV clicker in his hand.
He’s really embraced remote learning.
Why do painters always fall for their models?
Because they love them with all of their art.
I love you deerly.
Do you ever wake up, kiss the person beside you and feel glad you are alive?
I just did and apparently I will not be allowed on this airline again!
I always have a ball with you.
"I wood never leaf you."
What did the bowl of soup write on their Valentine?
I love you pho real.
"Did you hear how the baker proposed to his girlfriend?"
"Yeah, he told her he loafed her more than life itself"
"No, he actually told her how much he kneaded her"
You must be copper and terillium because you are Cu-Te
My counselor gave me a hug today
I guess I got shrinkwrapped
Why do accountants make good lovers?
They're great with figures.
What’s green and mean and stabs you when you hug it?
Cactus
What did the grilled cheese say to the frying pan?
You make me melt.
My gay lover asked me if date night was optional.
I said no, it's a mandate
"I lava you."
What shape is a kiss?
A-lip-tickle.
I cannoli be happy
What do German meat lovers breathe?
Hamburg-air
"Aloe you vera much."
If you really want to get a date at a restaurant, it’s always nice to cut to the cheese.
I’m soy
into you.
A toast to you:
You always know how to make everything butter.
When girls say they want a guy who can sweep them off their feet...
they do know that there’s a janitor ready for the job, right?