I grew facial hair without telling anyone.
It's my secret 'stache.
What's the best hairstyle for a gun?
Bangs.
I bought a wig for a dollar...
It was a small price toupee.
What do you call somebody who's addicted to trimming hair?
A clipptomaniac!
What's a bee's favorite hairstyle?
A buzz cut.
My friend didn't want to participate in the pick your new hairstyle conference but I convinced him...
He took part.
Why do Pencils shave?
To look sharp.
Another term for hair that's tied up in a bun is
a hairball
Huge explosion at the hair brush factory...
Investigators are still combing through the wreckage.
My daughter asked me if I could put her hair in a bun. I said...
“I could but I think the baker might object”.
My wife, whilst trying to brush my son's hair, told him he was having a bad hair day.
My son replied, "Oh, is it being knotty?"
My wife claims that she can wax my chest hair without me feeling any pain at all.
I don’t think she’ll be able to pull it off.
Why don’t orcas have hair?
They have whale pattern baldness.
How did Pavlov get such great hair?
He conditioned it.
I used to hate facial hair...
But then it grew on me.
Why does it take so long to shave a giant sheep with normal sized clippers?
Shear size.
My friend went bald years ago, but still carries his old comb with him.
He just can’t part with it.
Someone stole my wig!
That was a bald move.
How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it.
Coworker: Hey, I reallly like your hair! What's your secret?
Me: Thank-you! I don't get very many complements on it. Most people are gel-ous.
What do you call a line of men out on the lawn, having sausages and waiting to have a haircut and shave?
A barber queue.