I bought a wig for my wife, at a discount store...
Didn't want toupee full price.
My friend went bald years ago, but still carries his old comb with him.
He just can’t part with it.
What is a butchers favorite facial hair style?
Mutton chops.
My daughter asked me if I could put her hair in a bun. I said...
“I could but I think the baker might object”.
How did Pavlov get such great hair?
He conditioned it.
What do ghosts use to wash their hair?
Shamboo.
I gave my wife a broken hair-dryer for her birthday
She wasn’t blown away.
It took me forever to figure out where my mustache went.
Turns out, it was right under my nose the whole time.
Have you heard of the hair stylist that refuses to cut hair?
If she won't cut hair to earn a living, she'll certainly dye.
Why did dad shave his daughters barbie?
She wanted 100 doll hairs.
Someone put LSD in my hair gel
My hair has been spiked.
What kind of facial hair should a sea captain have?
A boatee.
How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it.
Why do Pencils shave?
To look sharp.
Not everyone looks good with a wig
But I think you could really pull it off.
Why do bees have sticky hair?
Because they use honey combs!
Why is Pavlov's hair so soft?
Because he conditions it.
How does a hairdresser stop themselves from cutting their own hair?
By sheer will.
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Where do sheep go to get their hair cut?
The baa-baa shop.
A bald man walks into the Hair Club. “I’d like to buy a hair piece if the price is right.”
Hair Club Salesperson: “Well sir, how much do you want toupee?”
I grew facial hair without telling anyone.
It's my secret 'stache.
What do you call somebody who's addicted to trimming hair?
A clipptomaniac!
What to you call a legume with facial hair?
A mustachio!
A guy was storing all the facial hair since he was young and had created a huge pile.
When his wife told him to get rid of it, he said "no, it's a must stash".
My wife hates the colour of her hair...
She's dyeing to change it.
What do you call it when you have proof that you bought a wig?
A receipting hairline
What does Satan shave with?
A hell razor.
I used to hate facial hair...
But then it grew on me.
What did the wig say to the head?
I got you covered.
Why was the man with a beard in pain?
Because he had a must ache.
What does a bee use to brush it's hair ?
A Honeycomb.
Did you get a hair cut?
No, I got them all cut.
Coworker: Hey, I reallly like your hair! What's your secret?
Me: Thank-you! I don't get very many complements on it. Most people are gel-ous.
My friend didn't want to participate in the pick your new hairstyle conference but I convinced him...
He took part.
I mustache you a question..
but I'll shave it for later.
"I like a man that can pull off facial hair."
I think your supposed to use a razor.
My wife claims that she can wax my chest hair without me feeling any pain at all.
I don’t think she’ll be able to pull it off.
My executive assistant has long hair.
I call him my mane man.
What does a funeral home hair stylist handle on a daily basis?
A brush with death
I grew facial hair without telling anyone.
It's my secret 'stache.
How does a lumberjack trim his beard?
With a chinsaw.
Huge explosion at the hair brush factory...
Investigators are still combing through the wreckage.
If Satan ever lost his hair...
There would be hell toupee.
Why does Bruce Wayne have such fabulous hair?
He uses conditioner Gordon.
My friends tell me I'm like a beard..
I grow down or sideways, but I never grow up!
Several years ago, I lost all my hair. Yes, I'm bald. But, I still keep my comb. I bring it with me everywhere still.
I just can't part with it.
My wife, whilst trying to brush my son's hair, told him he was having a bad hair day.
My son replied, "Oh, is it being knotty?"
When she saw her first strands of gray hair...
She thought she would dye.
Why doesn't the moon shave?
Because it waxes.
Someone stole my wig!
That was a bald move.