Did you hear about the elf who was a little hard of hearing?
She had to keep saying "Sleigh, what?"
Why did the elf use a duck to wake him on Christmas morning?
So he could be up at the quack of dawn!
Where do elves go to get famous?
Holly-wood.
What kind of bread do elves use to make sandwiches?
Why shortbread of course!
What do you call an elf who steals Christmas present wrapping from the wealthy and gives it to the poor?
Ribbon Hood.
What language do they teach at Elf School?
North Polish!
When the elves are clapping for their boss, we call it Santapplause.
If an elf can’t do something right now, how do they handle it?
Shelf it for later.
What does Santa use after trimming his beard?
Elftershave.
What kind of sandwich does Kissy the Elf like for lunch?
A wrap!
How many elves does it take to change a light bulb?
Ten! One to change the light bulb and nine to stand on each other's shoulders!
Why did Santa stop smoking a pipe?
It was bad for his elf!
What do elves learn when they go to school?
The elf-abet.
We've all heard about elf on a shelf, but have you ever heard of troll on a poll?
Where does an elf family stay when on vacation?
At a Ho-ho-ho-tel!
Why do Santa’s helpers go to therapy?
To help their elf esteem.
What would you call an elf with lots of money?
W-elfy!
What do you call an elf who hasn’t had a date in two years or more?
Elf on the shelf.
Who did all this shopping? Me, my elf, and I!
What do you call an elf that joins the 11 other elves in Santa’s workshop?
The twelf!
What happens to elves who misbehave?
They get the sack.
What do they call a wild elf in Texas?
Gnome on the range!
Did you hear about the Elf booted from the chorus?
He couldn't Fa-la-la-la-long.
What kind of motorbike do elves ride to work?
A Holly Davidson!
"Don’t be elfish," said momma elf to her son. "Share with your sister."