Is your refrigerator running? I was hoping to vote for it.
Air conditioner technicians...
love to vent about their job in order to cool off.
I finally managed to get rid of that nasty electrical charge I’ve been carrying. I’m ex-static!
What did the lamps do after their date?
They got turned on.
Apparently adding a fireplace to your home is the hot new trend...
...and chimney installations are through the roof!
Why are environmentalists attracted to electricity? It’s natural.”
My wife says she's divorcing me because of my obsession with television dramas.
But will she leave me...?
Find out next week.
I hate being married to a microwave
Every time I give her my two cents she blows up
What did the light bulb say to the generator? ‘I really get a charge out of you!”
What did the blender say to his crush?
"I have mixed feelings about you, but we might blend together perfectly."
Where do light bulbs go shopping? The outlet stores.”
Did you hear what the foolish gardener did?
The guy planted a light bulb and though he’d get a power plant.
How did the small oven greet the large oven?
He Microwaved.
I went to a Church yard sale looking for a grill...
Unfortunately, they only had friars.
What do power strips always say at their high school reunions? I haven’t seen you in light-years.”
How did the electrician pay for his new phone?
He charged it.
How many consultants do you need to change a light bulb?
You’ll get an estimate a week from Monday.
What is an electrician’s favorite flavor of ice cream? Shock-a-lot.”
What did the dough say after half an hour in the oven?
I’m bready.
Did you hear the one about the ice cube’s great escape from the freezer?
You could say it was a well thawed out plan.
How did the charger get rich?
He made a killing in the shock market.
Why do fluorescent lights hum? Because they can’t remember the words.”
Toasters were the first form of pop-up notifications.
I feel uncomfortable next to my fridge
It's way too cool for me
A sweater I bought was picking up static electricity. So, I returned it to the store. They gave me another one free of charge.”
What TV show did the astronaut appear in?
Dancing with the stars.
I put some bread in the toaster this morning, but it never popped up again
I think it might be comatoast.
Don't ever change a light bulb while the oven is on
You'll get burned out
I bought a secured warehouse where I keep appliances to clean pots, pans, plates, and silverware.
It's dishwasher safe!
How many museum curators does it take to change a light bulb?
6. 1 changes it and the other 5 preserve, display, and celebrate the old model.
Moisturize the air!
As fast as humidly possible.
Even the most intelligent people can’t survive a day without electricity, like Stephen Hawking.
What did Master Yoda say when he saw himself on the television?
HDMI
My dad argued with a stove
The conversation really started to heat up
Why did the man eat the light bulb?
He was hoping it would give him a bright idea.
What did the man say after he came out of the walk-in freezer?
"That experience was chilling."
My wife told me to stop eating Christmas leftovers out the fridge...
But I just can’t quit cold turkey
What did the energy company’s CEO credit her success to?
A series of strategic power moves.
How many students does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They use CFLs!
I bring my TV remote into every sports bar I go to so I can change the channel to whatever I want.
It’s a real game changer
What temperature do you set a toy oven?
Faux hundred degrees.
I bought a new heater for my wife.
She didn't like it first, but now I think she's warmed up to it.
It’s crazy that Dubai doesn’t show The Flintstones on TV...
But Abu Dhabi Do!
Me: Dad, can I turn the air-conditioner on?
Dad: did you shampoo it first?
Electric razors are the best thing since sliced beard.
Even the heaviest chandelier is pretty light.
How do you keep food warm in the refrigerator?
Keep it in the corner, because it is 90 degrees.
What is a surfer's least favorite kitchen appliance?
A Microwave
What do you call a slice of bread you put in the toaster?
A tanning bread.
What did the toaster say to the criminal bread?
"I'm taking you into crustody"