How did citizens of Ancient Greece measure land for crops?
By Demeter.
My son asked today “ Dad, are people in Spain cannibals?”
I answered “Why would you think that?”
He said “Well, my teacher said they mostly live off of tourists there.”
If you don’t have a lot of figurines from Ancient Greek mythology, I can give you a mini tour.
How come there are no automatic cars in Spain?
They’re all Manuel.
Did you hear about the famous Spanish streaker?
Senor Willy.
A company from Israel took over the Greek national cheese factory in Greece
Now it's called the Cheeses of Nazareth.
What do you call the generation of people that migrated from Italy?
Genitalia.
In Italy there is a group pf moms creating soft cheese...
They brand themselves as MOMzarella.
I’m in such a Henri to get to France!
What do France and a pigeon have in common?
Every 5 minutes, there is a coo.
A lot of William Shakespeare’s plays were based off of old Greek and Roman performances
That's playgarism if you ask me.
I love a good shindig. Just call me Napoleon Bonapart-y.
I used to live in in Aragon, in Spain.
Then I left.
I'm Aragone.
I’ve loved my vacation in France, but it’s time to Hugo.
So there’s this Spanish magician. His main trick was performing a spectacular vanishing act. He said that he’d vanish on the count of three. “Uno” “Dos”
And then he vanished, without a tres.
Don’t make such a Dreyfus about it.
Me and my friend were going to a costume party. He told me he was coming as a small island off the coast of Italy.
I said don’t be Sicily.
Don’t come to France without any Monet.
A soda can, a gas tank and the Greek god Eros walked into a bar?
The bartender shook his head, “Here comes trouble.” A patron at the bar said, “What’s wrong?” The bartender replied, “Those guys get together and they become cantankeros.”
What do you call the Greek God of Mexican chickens?
Apollo
What Beatles song charted highest in Italy?
Penne Lane.
Another cheese factory in France exploded...
I Camembert to hear this joke again!
Genoa bout the bridge collapse in Italy?
Ah well, we won't go over it then.
You heard about the Spanish woman that is now a man?
He’s called Senor Rita.
In Spain, you should not develop a program beyond 2.0.
Because that would be over dos.
Are these pants too tight in the Balzac?
Vasco de Balboa told the Queen of Spain, “I discovered a large body of water on my journey.”
She said, “Could you be a little more pacific?”
If I were to wander around in Italy...
Would I be roamin'?
I asked my Spanish girlfriend to make a to-do list
so she wrote down everything.
What is the most popular flower in France?
Croissanthemums.
What will you call two quizzers having a date in spain comic con?
Spanish con-quiz-daters.
Which city in France is the nicest?
Nice.
What do you call the Greek version of Spider-Man?
Pita Parker.
France – it’s just a oui bit different!
What is a female "Douchebag" in France called??
A douche-baguette.
What happens when you go to the bathroom in France?
European!
So in my trip to Spain i got attacked by a bull.
Oh man that's spainful.
French, French Revolution
There's a new film out about two insects that meet in Italy.
It's Rome ants.
It’s lonely between Germany and Spain
Not many France, nobody’s Nice to me, everyone seems to be Lyon. It’s just Eiffel.
Have you seen the Greek book that became a movie? You odyssey it.
My collection of Swiss watches was stolen in Spain.
Adios Omegas.
What's in the middle of Paris?
R.
I've finally worked out why Spain is so good at football
Nobody expects the Spanish in position.
The 70s/80s aesthetic has recently become pretty popular in France.
They say it has a certain Gen X sais quoi.
What do you call four Spanish guys in a capsized boat?
Quatro sinko.
I was joking with my mailman, and said I had a package to ship to Spain.... to Parcelona...
He didn't laugh though. The key to a joke like that is the delivery.
It wasn't til I studied Spanish as an adult that learned Spain discovered Canada.
As our teacher explained it, the first maps said "Acá, nada."
What do Spanish speaking people prefer to travel in groups of 2 or 4?
No tres-passing.
When in France, I have Nantes-thing to complain about.